FI is about to lose his dad…

posted 2 months ago in Emotional
Post # 2
658 posts
Busy bee

I’m so sorry Bee. My big sister died 5 months ago very suddenly and it was only 4 days before our baby sister’s wedding. Honestly I would just wait until after and see how your fiancé feels. If he thinks that it’s a good idea I would go ahead and continue with the wedding. I was thankful because if they had waited I think it would have been harder on everyone and we would have to deal with it all over again. I personally feel like her absence is harder the longer time goes by. 

Again though, I would just do whatever your FI is comfortable with. FMIL is probably just trying to keep something to look forward to right now.The wedding is probably the only thing that got us through that week.

Sending you guys love and prayers❤️

Post # 3
1978 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

kc1014 :  I have. FIL had cancer and died five weeks before the wedding. Read through my old posts for a recap and pm me if you have an personal questions. 

Post # 4
985 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

I’m so sorry. It’s good you are able to be with your FI and his family at this time. I’d wait on making a big decision. There is so much going on that it’s hard to think straight. I think it’s best to see what FI and his family want. Weddings are such happy events. It could be that the family will need something happy to look forward to at this time. 

Try to take care of yourself as much as possible at this time. We went through that with DH’s parents. It was a very difficult time. 

Post # 5
307 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2019

I really have nothing. I just wanted to say that I am so sorry. 

As pp said, now is not the time to make big decisions. 


Post # 6
1831 posts
Buzzing bee

Don’t think about it right this minute. See how you all feel after the funeral, in the days everyone goes back to work and the new reality sets in. 

Most of the time I feel it is better not to cancel the wedding, but there are exceptions.


Post # 7
226 posts
Helper bee

Oh, I’m so sorry. Maybe just try to get through these next few days before making any decisions. Then see how your fiancé feels about things, and go from there. My prayers for you and your fiancé ‘s family. So tough…

Post # 9
5157 posts
Bee Keeper

kc1014 :  

I’m so sorry, such a loss.  You know, it won’t be “a  rough day” it will be your wedding day . Of course there will  be moments of pure  grief  and  tears and that is right and proper and normal . But he has blessed the  day and you should honour that by doing what he asked.  

I do understand the feeling that everything will now be tainted by sadness, ( and probably  you are also feeling guilty at entertaining the  thought ) but it won’t  really ne tainted dear OP. If anyone is overly gloomy and attempts  any ‘how could you ‘ stuff, just remember , and remind  them  THAT IS WHAT HE WANTED YOU TO DO  and you are proud to be following his wishes , as something you are  able to do in his memory .

Work out how you want to word/do the speeches and acknowledgements with  FMIL  for after the ceremony. You don’t want to look like you are not remembering him properly but  you also don’t  want it to turn into  a memorial servioce 

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