FI is Atheist, I'm Christian. How can we raise our future children?

posted 5 years ago in Interfaith
Post # 151
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

My dear. If you are a Christian and have faith in the scriptures then are your trusting God and surrending your life waiting for the husband He has for you? He would not unequally yoke you. Or you getting married because you don’t want to wait and want to control this part of your life. 

My first question would be your faith. If you are a Christian, there are several scriptures that speak of raising children in the fear of The Lord, to not be unequally yoked, etc. so is your faith based on believing them or do you go to church because that is what your suppose to do?

Are you getting a married to an unbeliever because you hope he will eventually be saved ? People say one thing before getting married. People change after getting married. Life changes people. What if you have kids and he suddenly changes his mind? You never know and it happens all the time. 

just food for thought.  

Post # 152
Member
1430 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

buzzingbride2b:  ” I’m a very strong Christian and it still bothers me (and it always will) that my Fiance is not a believer.”

DO NOT GET MARRIED! I repeat, do not marry this man! It isn’t fair to either one of you if you will resent him for something that you know will not change. My Fiance is a Christian and I’m agnostic but I’m completely okay with our kids going to Church and learning about Christianity as long as they get to choose when they are of an age to make such a monumental decision, whether or not they want to be baptized. Ironically enough I go to church with FI’s family more than he does, just because I find religion to be fascinating. However, if neither one of you can compromise on this, then you don’t need to be tying the knot.

Post # 153
Member
209 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Train station ceremony / Hilton reception

buzzingbride2b: My experience in my own life and in viewing others lives tells me that it can be EXTREMELY damaging to force ones religion down their child’s throat.

 

I was brought up in a very Christian family and I spent a lot of my childhood TERRIFIED of demons, ghosts, hell, and the end of the world.  I was also told about Jesus’ love and things like that, but the scary things scared me too much.

 

You could let your children know that you are a Christian, but I would strongly suggest allowing them to decide for themselves what they want to believe in.

 

It sounds dangerous for you to have kids, to be honest, because you’re already saying things like “I really want my kids to be Christians.”  So what if one of them grows up to be agnostic?  What if one of them is  gay? What if one of them wants to be Buddist and that just happens to make them happy?  Personal freedom is incredibly important for children to grow up to be happy, healthy individuals.

 

I still have anxiety because of all the Christian guilt I grew up with.  Please don’t do that to your children.  I’m 24 and finally past it and very thankful I have my own critical thinking skills — but I went against all odds against me, and there were many thanks to religion.

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