- 6 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
Let me start off by saying I’m happy with my wedding date but I feel Fiance really pushed for a date I didn’t think I’d be ready by (I was hoping for a 2013 date). Keep in mind that this time last year, I was actually engaged to someone else that I had been with for 5 years, so I thought giving some extra time wasn’t such a bad idea. I know I still have a while before the wedding in August, but I have NO idea how we’re going to afford it, not to mention I’m in grad school, work 60 hours a week and try to maintain somewhat of a life…I just don’t have the time for wedding planning.
Before we even had a budget we picked our venue, caterer, photographer and DJ…these decisions were pushed by Fiance within just a few weeks of our engagement. I was worried about cost etc, and thought we should really think about it. He had his parents put down a deposit for each and said we’ll deal with our budget later. I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works. We’re getting great deals with our vendors, but I still don’t think we can afford to pay off the balance, not to mention everything else. We both already live paycheck to paycheck and I keep trying to explain this to him and he just doesn’t get it. He makes about 1/3 of what I do, lives rent free in his deceased grandmother’s house, doesn’t have a single bill to pay so sometimes I feel like he doesn’t understand that every $ I make, and I mean every $ is already accounted for before I even get it. I feel so overwhelmed with the cost and he just doesn’t get it. His family is fairly well off so anytime he wants anything he can’t afford or just simply doesn’t want to buy he makes a quick call to his parents and like magic, it’s his. I don’t think he understands the whole concept of money and that there are some people that just don’t have it available to them. My mom is trying her best (and I really mean trying) to save up $2,000 to contribute. She’s a single of 3 and disabled! So it’s not like I’m getting a lot of financial help. We’re expecting close to 250 guests (both our faults…HUGE families). I have absolutely no idea how this wedding is going to be paid for and anytime I try to bring it up he tells me to stop worrying. How can I not worry? I can’t even afford to buy STDs!!!
Aside from the money he just won’t participate. If I make it seem like something is really important he’ll break down and ‘do’ it but that usually ends in him telling me he doesn’t know what he’s doing or doesn’t know how to find it. Uh hello! Ever heard of google? I’m just so frustrated and the worst part is I feel like my partner isn’t there for me, not only that but making it harder on me and not listening to me when I try to explain this to him.