(Closed) Thanks for the advice:)

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
18637 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wow that’s pretty tactless of him.  Some guys just don’t have a good filter, I’m sure that he didn’t mean to be rude to you.

Post # 4
10366 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Wow. That is definitely in the “things guys should never say to their significant others, ever, under any circumstances” category…!!! I’m so sorry! I’m sure you actually looked beautiful!

Post # 5
2394 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010


I completely understand why that would hurt your feelings, but I’m sure your costume looks great.

(What is it, by the way?)

Men are seldom very good at explaining what they mean when it comes to clothes – and they freak out when they think there’s even the remotest possibility that the “F” word might be involved.

I mean, he may have wanted to say something completely innocuous about the costume, but froze up when it became clear that h might’ve been construed as saying something unflattering.

Post # 6
786 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

MissAsB is right, guys do not have a filter! I’m sure he thinks you are gorgeous though. I would ignore his comments, I am sure he didn’t mean for it to come out like that. I don’t think guys understand those comments are crushing. My Fiance does not have a filter sometimes either, makes me want to slap him Teen Mom style… Wink

Post # 7
79 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I really dont think he meant to hurt you, but guys are just…. well there guys enough said!

And I always lock myself in the bathroom to cry too! Did he apologize afterward?


@MsJ126     I love the expression slap him teen mom style!  

Post # 8
1235 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Ok. Sorry but I don’t understand why you are getting so upset. You wanted his opinion and I don’t see where he went out of his way or was untactful in what he said. You may not like his opinion but he didn’t say anythring wrong. It really sounds like he was trying to be as tactful as possible. He didn’t say you were fat. He didn’t say your boobs sagged. He didn’t say you looked bad. He just suggested a way to make it look better on you and as your Fiance I think that is an important and difficult job for him. I would take what he says as constructive critisism. He doesn’t want you to go out and not look your best. I guess I really don’t understand why girls ask for a guys opinion and when they say anything other than exactly what they want to hear they get upset. If something I am wearing makes me look fat I would WANT him to tell me that so I can change or find a way to fix it.

Post # 9
7689 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Oh, it has taken me nearly 30 years to train my husband in what to say/how to say it!  Guys just don’t get it!  :-S

Post # 10
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

damn, men are such stumblers! by ‘costume’ did you mean your wedding gown? or your wedding night lingerie? either way, i’m all for corsets/torsolettes/ etc, especially for fuller figures. i’m a bit saggy and jiggly and my corsette is not all boning and wire – just enough stablity to give me a smooth shape and lift up what time and gravity has dragged down!

men are visual/imaginative creatures too. perhaps he would like to imagine that underneath your ‘costume’ you are all sexy kittenish? why not splurge and get some nice figure shaping underwear for your big day? it will make a difference to your overall outer look, and get him nicely bothered about what might lie underneath 🙂

Post # 11
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

His pause kind of tells me that he didn’t know how to say it and wanted to be very careful. I don’t think he was trying to be insensitive at all. It sounds like he was trying to be honest and tactful. He loves you enough to try to be honest, but not harsh. Go give him a hug!

Post # 12
2588 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I don’t really see what was worth getting so upset about. He didn’t say anything particularly hurtful, imo…maybe there’s something else bothering you lately so you’re more sensitive than usual?

The topic ‘Thanks for the advice:)’ is closed to new replies.

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