(Closed) FI living in another state :(

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I’m sorry, I’m sending you a virtual hug! How far is the commute? 

Post # 4
2125 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

🙁 Big hugs girl! This is hard.

How long are y’all planning on working it out that way? SO and I are in a LDR for 4 years (though we’re halfway done whoop!) so I definitely feel your pain. Feeling alone at night or after a bad day is definitely hard.. you just need to get into a routine that helps you feel better about the distance. Work on getting emotionally closer during your time spent physically apart.

Post # 5
2891 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

ldr’s are hard. Nights are harder. spend lots of time on the bee in the evenings 😀

Post # 6
82 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Long distance relationships are awful. I hate mine because there’s also a 7 hours time difference. If you’re not using it already. Skype is your best friend and I hope all works out!


Post # 7
726 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@ashnic87:  Aw, I’m sorry – long distance relationships really suck! (I know this, because I’m in one myself at the moment. My Fiance lives all the way in Ireland, and I’ve only been to see him once since we got engaged nine months ago!) 

@killakoala:  The time difference thing is a killer, isn’t it? I’m six hours behind my Fiance, and thankfully I’m not working at the moment, otherwise we’d never find time to talk. 

Post # 10
1297 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m sorry! Darling Husband and I are temporarily long distance (4 hours).

secondchances Yeah, its not so bad when I’m busy during the day. It’s at night when we would usually be hanging out. And once we’re back in the same house I probably won’t be on the bee as much.

Just a few more weeks for me. Thinking about all you ladies!

Post # 11
2889 posts
Sugar bee

@ashnic87:  If you live 1 hour and 20 minutes away I don’t think I understand why he moved to his parents who are an hour away. Honestly 20 minutes longer commute is 40 minutes a day and I get that that adds up but I think its worth it to come home and eat dinner together and wake up together in the morning. I mean I guess he drives that extra 20 mins to see you at least once during the week. Maybe he could work something out where he sleeps at his parents’ on Wed. for one mid week short commute and is still living with you the rest of the time. Ideally you would find a new place soon but I imagine the extra 40 minutes per day could be overcome for the time being, especially if oyu have dinner waiting for him at home so you can maximize your time together in the evenings.

September marks a year that Darling Husband and I have been living apart due to his “new” job which is 2.5 hours away. So I get it but I also know after a year of living apart, I would much prefer a 80 minute commute to live together. I would also try negotiating one day working from home if possible as I have that option now and when possible work from his placeo n Friday and then travel early Monday morning. 

Post # 13
2889 posts
Sugar bee

@ashnic87:  Thanks for clearifying, I thought his parents were an hour from his new job not an hour from you. 

Post # 14
491 posts
Helper bee

LDR’s are hard. Ditto to other poster’s skype suggestions.  It sucks, but you will get a little more used to  it eventually. Keep reminding yourself of the good aspects of living alone. Go out with friends, work on a hobby you haven’t had much time for recently. Study more. 

In my relationship, it always helps to talk about future plans – a concrete thing you can think about doing together at a certain time. You guys will be seeing eachother much more often than my SO and I, but maybe you can plan some fun and new date nights to do one night you do get to see eachother – make that time special. Planning also gives you something to do with your newly found free time. I’ve planned so many vacations in my head!

Is there a min-point place betweeen the two places that you could get an apartment? 


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