(Closed) FI NOT excited to wear ring. At all.posted 7 years ago in Grooms/men
- 7 years ago
It’s got to be difficult with him not even wanting to talk about it, but I agree that one thing to bring up could be a super unique ring.
My Fiance found a ring through Etsy that has dinosaur bone, meteorite and titanium. Basically, the manliest wedding ring we could imagine. He’s SUPER excited to get his ring now, and we’re going to work with the jeweller to customize it even more.
Could you bring up something like that? “Hey honey, check out this dinasaur bone and meteorite wedding ring I found!” (Or something that’s tailored to his interests). You can DM me for info on the jeweller, or probably find through google pretty easily!
- 7 years ago
We eloped and there wasn’t a lot of time for ring shopping, so he said he would wear his late father’s wedding band.
I wasn’t crazy about that idea because I really wanted to get him a ring of his own. But we were so busy moving me into his place, there really wasn’t much time to deal with it at the time.
But after a few weeks of being married I noticed that he wasn’t wearing the wedding band that often. And it bugged me, so I finally said something.
He told me that he hated wearing jewelry, so I told him that I hate wearing a bra sometimes but I have to do it anyway.
Then he said that he does a lot of work with yard equipment and tools, and he didn’t want to scratch the ring or ruin it. I told him if I got him his own ring, rather than using his dad’s ring, it wouldn’t matter if it got damaged because I would have it repaired or replaced if necessary.
Then he tried to use the excuse that he wasn’t planning on cheating on me, so what was the point?
I told him I knew he wasn’t going to cheat. But that from a social standpoint, other people would be looking at him and assuming he wasn’t married. And single women would see “no ring” and think he was unattached and hit on him. And that bothered me.
I also pointed out that friends/co-workers/casual acquaintances who knew him, and who knew he was married, would notice he wasn’t wearing a ring and would wonder if we were having problems, or if he had a wandering eye.
That was what convinced him to wear the ring.
Also too he could tell this was going to be a big issue for me and I wasn’t going to let it go, so he decided to keep me happy.
And I’m really glad he did!
We ended up picking out a new band for him that wasn’t big and wide — I think it’s 3 mm but can’t remember — so he finds it more comfortable than his father’s band, which was just huge.
Just keep working on your guy and he will probably come around eventually once he realizes this is important to you. Good luck!
Oh and P.S., in nearly three years of marriage the wedding band hasn’t yet been mangled or torn apart by lawn equipment, lol.
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