Post # 1
My problem is just what the title said – my Fiance thinks that paying for a professional photographer is a waste of money. I’ve found someone who I think is great; I’ve been impressed with her work (it’s extensive) AND know THREE different people who have hired her and been thrilled (mind you, those were for maternity/family shoots, but she has done A LOT of weddings and I love her pics and her blog).
We will be paying $2400 and that will include 8 hours of coverage with an assistant, our free consultation, unlimited and extensive shooting in a variety of locations, 40-50 of our best photos online with a link for our family and friends, 400-450 images retouched at high resolution on photo DVD, and an engagement shoot for 1.5 hours with 75-100 images retouched at high resolution on photo DVD. We will also own the rights to all of the images. I think this is pretty good and am ready to sign the contract she’s sent us.
Fiance and I both met with her this past weekend and he liked her as well. I’m just not sure how to convince him that this is worth it and also important. I have mentioned how we only get to do this once and that it’s important to me to have the pictures. As I write this, I realize that I haven’t told him how important it is to me (and my mom) to have pictures of my family together while I still can (my parents are nearing their 70s and not in the best of health). I will mention that. Beyond that, I don’t think he sees the difference between having a pro photographer and just having a friend take the pics.
Did any other Bees run into this problem with their FI? We’re not particularly short on money, so it’s not like we can either have pro pics done or buy groceries next month – we’re ok. Oh, and we live in Toronto if that makes a difference to anyone price-wise. Thanks. 🙂
Post # 3
@Juliepants: I’m sort of going through the same thing with my Fiance, at the moment. He’s cool with spending the money (to an exent), but he’s expecting A LOT for that. For instance, if I were to show him that package you just talked about, he’d be livid at the fact that it doesn’t include very much ‘in hand’, such as a wedding album, or parent albums. I’ve tried to tell him the post-production takes a lot of time, etc., but he just doesn’t understand.
We’re in Barrie, so we’re in the same sort of area..
Post # 4
I don’t know if you can convince him to see your way. But that’s non compramisable on my books. I think in order to convince him, say that you, will be paying for all of it. Can you afford to?
Post # 5
Photos are the part of your wedding that you will have to keep and cherish for the rest of your life. It’s one of the MOST important aspects of the wedding, IMO, even more so than the dress.
Post # 6
Look at it this way, after the wedding day is over what are the only lasting things?
1) the rings
2) the photos
3) the marriage
All else (i.e. food, location, booze, etc) is gone after the day.
Isn’t it worth spending money on what will last?
Also, once you have the photos, then you have gifts all ready for the following Christmas. Wedding albums for the parents and grandparents.
Post # 7
My fi felt the same way, his Brother-In-Law used to do some professional photography and even took pictures at fi’s first wedding… He insisted that we didn’t need a photographer and what it came down to was me saying quite frankly “I don’t care if it’s not important to you to have professional pictures, it is to me and this is who we’re getting”.
I really just had to put my foot down and once I did he thought it was a better idea, then we got our engagement pictures and he saw how awesome those turned out so now he’s on board completely and his Brother-In-Law gets to just enjoy the wedding instead of having to work. 🙂
Post # 8
Hi girls, thanks for the speedy responses. I’m feeling a bit stressed out!
@brighteyedgirl: I hear you about the “in hand” products – parent albums (well, they’re more like coffee table books but I like them) are an extra $150 or $100 each if you get two (which we will). Bah. I guess I’m mostly having a hard time convincing him we even need pro pics.
@vmec: Yeah, I think I actually threw at out there when I was getting frustrated (“Well we’re having them and if it’s such a big deal I’ll just pay for them myself!” haha). I can afford to do it myself and if that’s what it comes down to then I will. I’d be surprised if he wanted me to do that, though, since I pay for a lot of other things at home and we try to keep things even.
Oh, I just refreshed and saw all the other responses – thank you!
@Mrs. Fireworks: I agree about the importance!
@KatNYC2011: I will definitely make that point to him as well, thanks.
@o0olibelulao0o: You sound just like us – here’s hoping mine is more on board after he sees the e-pics, too. 🙂
Post # 9
Show him pictures on http://youarenotaphotographer.com/, and see if he changes his tune. That site is rife with ‘fauxtogs’ who are just amateurs with a point and shoot, thinking they can take nice photos. Let him decide after taking a gander at some of those doozies.
Post # 10
Ditto what wonderwoman said. Show him wedding pictures that you DON’T like, in comparison to what you do. If its important to you, just make it clear. And maybe be willing to compromise on something else, if possible.
Post # 11
You should also mention that you want your friends to be able to enjoy the wedding without having to worry about getting pictures for you. Also, professional photos are edited and photos from friends are not. It’s amazing what a little (or a lot) of editing can do.
Post # 12
After all of the money spent on everyting else the only things that are left at the end are the marriage and the photos to remember it by. If he doesn’t agree I’d book it anyhow and I am sure he’ll be thankful later!
Post # 13
@Wonderwoman217: This- I know that at first wedding photography has a sticker shock, but I think you really need to sit your Fiance down and explain why a good photographer charges this much (experience, artistic expertise, good editing skills, dependability)
Make the point that all the $$ you spend on food, music and booze is just going to be for one day, while the $ you spend on a photographer is for a product that will last your lifetime and will bring great joy to your family when they hang prints up in their houses.
I think you just need to put it into perspective and explain that the photographer is not charging thousands to work for one day- they will be working for at least 6 weeks editing.
Post # 14
@Wonderwoman217: & @marthanotstewart: Oh….my. Haha, thanks for mentioning that site.
@MissComicBook: Good point about talking to him about the editing. I don’t think he realizes what the before and after’s of wedding pics can look like.
He has a family friend who is a total fauxtographer and I think his mom was really surprised when we didn’t book her (she has a website and a studio and everything but the pictures are JUST AWFUL; not our style, very posed, lots of pics of BMs with fake laughter). I wonder if I can show him a few of hers (without him knowing they are hers, I don’t want to offend his old friends!) and then a few from our photog’s site. I just don’t know if he’ll get it, but I’ll try.
Post # 15
@sheilad72: & @danicalifornia: Thank you, you’re right about emphasizing that this is one of the things we’ll spend on but still be able to have and keep. I will talk to him about the time it takes to edit pics; I think he does realize that it’s not just $2400 divided by 8 hours, but that there is a lot more work that goes into things.
Post # 16
My Fiance had similiar thoughts on the photography. He figured that since we are having such a small wedding that it really didn’t matter. Well, I photograph weddings, so I know it matters and it was important to me.
We were on the same page about the cost and that we needed to keep it under $1000 dollars, which isn’t easy! Luckily, I found a great photographer that was offering an insane discount on craigslist. Fiance loved her and so we booked her.
I think with him, (he’s an amatuer photographer) and he didn’t like anyone’s work, so that’s why he was against it, but when I found our girl, he was all over it, plus she was cheap.