- 4 years ago
- Wedding: January 2015
Going Anon for this one just because I don’t feel 100% comfortable posting under my regular name.
So FI and I have had a long 2 year engagement and we are getting married late this year. Wedding planning has finally begun and we are both very excited.
A couple of times during fights/spats FI has pulled a card that is just dirty in my opinion. He’ll say “Well maybe we’ll just cancel/delay this wedding!” in an attempt to shut me up or express his frustration.
I have discussed with him in depth if he truly wants to cancel/delay the wedding but he says he doesn’t want to at all and doesn’t want me thinking like that. He says this is just “how he deals” and I should just know he doesn’t mean it.
In the past he used to vent out by telling me to “get out of his house” when he was mad but never actually wanted me to leave and always said it was just how he dealt with things. After I actually left and went to my mothers one night did he realize he shouldn’t say that if he didn’t mean it.
Since that was the only way to get him to stop I fear the only way to get him to realize this is to actually cancel the wedding and show him how devestating it actually is and not something to joke about. The only way I see it is me “faking” a cancellation to give him a feel of what we are giving up but I fear he’ll still know if is all still happening and not take it seriously.
It breaks my heart to hear him suggest cancelling/delaying the wedding because I snap at him or am in a bad mood. He doesn’t seem to understand that you shouldn’t say this stuff lightly and I don’t know how to handle this because some day he may be serious and I’ll just ignore him.