(Closed) FI wants to invite a girl who is clearly into him

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 32
Member
703 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

you’re marrying him, not her. that right there should send a clear signal to her if she hasn’t gotten the hint yet. plus, since she is a friend of your guy, it’d be mean to not invite her.

this is the kind of situation i’m in. Fiance has a good friend who is a female and i can’t stand her. she looks for opportunities to make it known that she is/was into him. he doesn’t see her that way. i respect their friendship and would let him invite her because i’m marrying him. 😉

 

 

Post # 33
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

The problem isnt that shes into him, its that she flirts with him.  I have 3 bridesmaids, 2 of them are guys, and one has confessed a crush on me, but he would never act on it and is very respectul and great towards me and Fiance both.  I even had a  2 night stand with him right before meeting Fiance.  

Post # 34
Member
2624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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@badabing88:  This +1000!!

Post # 35
Member
2624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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@208bride:  This this this!

Post # 36
Member
1876 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@cmrobert:  I see zero reason for this girl to get an invite. She was a classmate, key word “was”. And is not a friend to you, or really to him. If you get a bad vibe from someone I think it’s totally within your right to not want her at your wedding.

Post # 37
Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

View original reply
@inspiration86:  I really dislike people who assume other girls are “sluts.” It was just uncalled for. No one deserves that judgement. 

Post # 38
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@cmrobert:  I’d be fine with inviting her. I won’t be fine with her touching/flurting with him. And I’d tell him so. He should make it clear to her that he’s not fine with it – even if he takes it as not-flurting, give him specific examples and if that happens, let him tell her to stop. But if he keeps the boundary super clear, she can’t be a threat. And maybe your wedding might be a good chance for her to realize that your Fiance is really yours.

Post # 39
Member
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@cmrobert:  I would try to look at in the reverse. How would you feel if he asked you not to invite a close friend because he thought that friend had a thing for you and you knew he really didn’t. Would you be really upset that your close friend had to miss your day because of your husband’s feelings that he might be into you…just a thought.

Post # 40
Member
292 posts
Helper bee

 I think I’d invite her if she would be on the list anyway (if she didn’t act like that) Then she can sit there and watch him marry you and you can be like”ha b***h he married me! ” But I’m a little spiteful like thatTongue Out

Post # 41
Member
803 posts
Busy bee

In my head it’s pretty simple – at your wedding you want people there whom both of you like and whom you both like in return. Clearly you don’t like this chick and she doesn’t like you so it seems reasonable enough to not invite her. Have you talked to your fiance? Does he care whether she’s there or not?

Edit: I just properly read the title of your post. I would still try to point out how uncomfortable she makes you feel and hopefully he’ll understand.

 

Post # 42
Member
436 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

@cmrobert:  Invite her. You probably won’t even notice her… and guess what? She gets to watch you marry your fiance, dance with him, kiss him, etc etc. I think that is fantastic.

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