(Closed) FI wants to relocate, need advice

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

If you’re 100% positive that you can’t get your PhD (or something similar) in Austin then you’re basically taking a leap of faith that only you know is worth it…but I do wish you luck deciding.

Post # 4
Member
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Are you sure you can get your PhD in your current location? If you want to go into academia, is the school you want strong in your field of study? What is their placement record like? There are a lot of out of work PhDs, so you HAVE to go to the strongest school possible. If that isn’t your current city, then you’ll have to consider living apart anyway during your coursework and, depending on the field, maybe even beyond.

Post # 5
Member
3720 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Could you get your PhD in Texas? That will influence my answer.

For me, I was supposed to start my PhD in the fall of 2013 and would be moving to Boston, Philly, or San Fransico. I met my Fiance and he proposed before I applied. His job can only be in DC or Denver, two cities that aren’t an option for me. He makes twice as much as me and my earning trajectory with my masters is comperable to that of with my PhD. He also has a ton of family and support here and it would be the ideal place to raise kids. We decided that it was best for us to stay in DC in our jobs and have a life together. It wasn’t giving up the dream, but just making the best choice for us together, instead of as two individuals.

Post # 6
Member
8042 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@ssttpp:  Sounds like a tough situation… you both want things and one of you will likely have to give up what they want.

Could you live apart while doing your phd? Not ideal, but if it’s something you really want, you could do that.

Is this a once in a lifetime job opportunity or could he wait a few years? (sorry not sure how long phd would take… I’ve heard anywhere from 3-7 years). Then again, maybe now is the time for him to get his career on the fast track, and this could mean better retirement options etc. long-term.

I don’t know… personally I would probably move for his job because it would translate into more tangible results/money/benefits sooner. But then again if you have your heart set on the phd, then you shouldn’t have to just give it up.

 

Post # 7
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I would seriously consider trying an LDR for the duration of your PhD, unless you can not support yourself without him. You don’t want to be bitter later fo rnot following your own dreams!

Post # 10
Member
3583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Yes but do CC profs in Austin have Masters or PhDs?  In CA, they have Masters.

Post # 11
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

What do you want to get your PhD in?  The University of Texas at Austin is in, well, Austin…

Post # 14
Member
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

If the PhD is what is holding you back, there are tons of really good schools in and near Austin. Consider taking some online/remote classes while you transition to Austin; some brick-and-mortar universities offer 100% distance learning programs that earn the same credits as going in person, plus there is always a purely virtual campus like University of Phoenix (just be wary of their financing, it is a lot more complicated than it seems when they explain it to you).

Personally I’d be unwilling to let him miss out on a very very good opportunity just for the sake of getting my degree, simply because there are a LOT of places where you can earn a degree and  good opportunities don’t come around too often.

Post # 15
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@ssttpp:  What is UT?  University of Texas?  So they won’t accept you????  WHAT????  I need more information please!

Post # 16
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@fishbone:  There are much better schools than University of Phoenix available.  

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