(Closed) Fiance bought engagement and wedding rings on e-bay used :-(

posted 8 years ago in Rings
Post # 37
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: February 2014

In saying this… if it’s getting to you so much, talk to him about it… He should understand how you are feeling… you don’t want this to be an issue for the years to come… Id you want a new ring (he should accept your decision)… You are not being spolit little brat – i guess a wedding ring is the time you get spolit!  

Post # 38
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee

My engagement ring is 80 years old and I love it! Nothing wrong with wearing used jewelry. Plus you are giving those rings a second chance at true love! Your fiancé shouldn’t have lied to you though. And believe me, I understand people’s weird stigma with used things. We have this perception that newer is always better. We like that brand new, crisp, right-out-of-the-box feeling. I get that. But I noticed that you said your first impression was that you thought the ring was beautiful. Try to remember how you felt when you first saw it before you found out that it was previously owned. And remember, at the end of the day – it’s just stuff, and stuff only has meaning which we artificially ascribe to it. 

Post # 41
Member
3682 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Did he actually get a good deal on the rings, or assume it was good because they were second-hand?

  • The Ex’s Jewelry– no way is that ok 
  • Used Running Shoes–Eew.
  • Used Engagement Ring–depends on the ring, really

Since you like the style of the rings, I think it’s ok as long as he actually got a good deal for what they are.  If you could’ve had one just as nice and brand new for the same price, I’d be upset.

Post # 42
Member
119 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I wouldnt mind a used ring. It’s symbolic of your love you share. In my opinion I’d rather my boyfriend not spend a ton of money on a ring when that money can used as part of a down payment on a house. Have it repolished. I totally agree with you about the lying part though, it was kind of a silly thing for him to lie about.

Just remember he was thinking of when and wanting to spend the rest of his life with you when he purchased it. =]

Post # 43
Member
2539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I think you’re might be overreacting just a smidge, though he should have just been up-front from the beginning.

Your Fiance had a certain amount of money to spend on this. He chose to spend it on a less expensive pre-owned set, which means that you probably got more diamond/ring for your money than he would have if you’d bought it new. That’s a win in my book!

When you go to have the ring sized, just ask for it to be re-dipped. It’ll look literally brand-new out-of-the-box.

Post # 44
Member
430 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - The Skinner Barn

@weddingadvice99:  I totally see why you have a problem with this. My fiance bought my ring off of the internet from some strange site. He’s not so net-savvy so I was worried when he told me this and asked him to please take it to the jeweler and make sure that it’s real. When he took it to the jeweler, they assured him that it was definitely real (phew!) but then asked him if it was used. Apparently it has signs of wear on it (I haven’t seen it yet so I don’t know if it was obvious) and it was clear that it had been worn for a couple of months. That creeps me out quite a bit, especially since the seller told him it was from a jewelery store that closed down. Now I have to wonder where it really came from and whether or not there’s some bad mojo attached to it. 

Since you know exactly where your ring came from and it’s not the best circumstance, I understand your issues with it. I would say that you should explain your concerns to your fiance and, if it really bothers you, consider picking out a new setting together. Maybe picking out a new setting will make it feel brand new to you.

Good luck!

Post # 45
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Wow….. I’d ask him to resell it on e-bay and pick out a new bridal set together with that money.

Post # 46
Member
2496 posts
Buzzing bee

@weddingadvice99:  Can you get it polished and replated to make it look newer and more like yours? I can understand how upset are over this, but maybe giving it a new TLC will at least make you feel a little better about it.

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