(Closed) Fiance broke ankle 3.5 weeks before Hawaii elopement!

posted 4 years ago in Elopement
Post # 2
7806 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Ouch that sucks! One of my husbands cousins was headed to mexico for xmas and broke his leg 2 days before they left. They still ended up going, but he was on crutches or in a wheel chair for most of the time. Nice way to relax though lol. 

I like your idea of a courthouse wedding and then honeymoon on the beach, but unless you’re in a rush, postponing the entire thing for 2 months isn’t *that* terrible. Especially if its really important to you to get legally married on the beach. 

Post # 3
154 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Ouch. That’s terrible, bee! Plus I’m sure he’s in a lot of pain right now. I’m sure you are – but make sure you are supporting him and not just being sad because of the elopment plans. (Sometimes when I think I’m supporting my husband, it’s not very apparent that I am, so I have to work to be extra supportive. I’m not saying that you are like this… but I am, so just wanted to throw it out there as some friendly advice – just in case. 🙂 )

Especially if he has to have surgery, I’d postpone Hawaii. I have two colleagues with broken ankles right now (and they were SEVERE breaks), one after three months is finally using crutches after having to avoid putting ANY weight on it at all. The other is almost to three months and has barely been able to leave the house because the ankle was shattered. It sounds like your FI’s isn’t that bad since he’s already using crutches to get around rather than a wheelchair.

Instead of a courthouse wedding, could you do an elopement in the city where you live – do the same thing you’d planned on the beach but out in nature wherever you live? You could pick a nice spot that is easily accessible. Then you can do your dream beach trip later and still take your dress and get the pictures that you wanted.

Post # 4
6216 posts
Bee Keeper

Aww that sucks! I’d definitely still get married if I were in your situation… you can have a romantic renewal just between the two of you at the beach, not even a stranger officiant needed to ensure all goes legally. It might even be better!

its not really the same but my husband smashed his pinky pretty badly before our wedding. Left hand, of course. There’s a clunky looking finger splint in all our photos but it’s just a funny memory now (actually I was mean enough to tease him from the start). You’ll both get there too. 

Post # 5
2758 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

That sucks, Bee! I’m so sorry! Love Kauai but it’s definitely a more active vacation destination. I would not recommend going until your man finishes his PT. 

I guess the question you really need to answer in this situation is: how significant is your original wedding date versus the location you envisioned? Only you know which is the most important. 

Hope he heals quickly! My husband broke his wrist in a bike accident and needed surgery and OT on his hand and wrist. I definitely recommend calcium supplements! It speeds up the healing. 

Post # 6
10286 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

I was recently in a walking boot due to breaking a bone clean entirely off my ankle (evulsion fracture) and I was SO miserable for the first month. I was so upset to not be able to dance, hike and walk my dog.

Seeing activities you want to do and can’t is pretty awful when you’re in the beginning stage of what seems devastating at the time. So I would pospone the trip for him if you can. 

Agree with PP re ideas for getting married now versus later. Mostly, try not to show how disappointed you are, I’m guessing your Fiance is in that horrible first stage of grieving all that he can’t do which feels like it will never end when you’re in it. Trying not to sound dramatic, but impart the level of upset and depression that can accompany an injury that puts a huge damper on activities. 

So sorry that this happened, Bee and hoping that he recovers well and you can enjoy your trip together soon!

Post # 7
2327 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Oh, that sucks so hard! I’m sorry. I think if it were me, I’d rather postpone the whole shebang a few months, rather than keep your wedding date and then honeymoon later. I would have loved to have gotten married on a beach, and if I got as close as you were with everything finalized, I’d be so disappointed to just give it up completely.

Post # 9
3533 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

So sorry about his ankle. If it was me, I’d go ahead and get married. We enloped at a B&B about 40 minutes from home. I wouldn’t have postponed our wedding for anything. We had already been together for many years before we got engaged. 

Post # 10
7912 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

View original reply
hemiandhighheels :  Can you file for domestic partnership to get on his health insurance now and then figure out how you want to handle the wedding once you know more about his prognosis?

Post # 11
4509 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Ugh, I am so sorry!  I would definitely put the HI wedding plans on hold.  Realistically, it could take longer than 3 months to heal from a bad break.  My mother never fully recovered from breaking her ankle.  Your Fiance may be in physical therapy for an extended period of time to recover and manage pain.

Personally I’d probably have the local courthouse elopement and plan for a much further date to honeymoon in HI. Maybe 8-12 months down the road.  This way you can enjoy your time there, possibly do a photo shoot, etc.

Post # 12
1265 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Holly Hedge Estate

View original reply
hemiandhighheels :  Any chance you are going under his health insurance because you are losing your current insurance? If that’s the case you would most likely be allowed to be added to his plan due to “life- changing circumstances” i.e. loss of job; loss of health coverage, etc.  My d.h was losing his a few months before our wedding so I was able to switch him to mine immediately because of that situation.

Post # 14
7912 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

View original reply
hemiandhighheels :  So sorry this happened! Echoing PPs, it could take longer than a few months for him to be ready to travel. If you’re anxious to pin down new travel dates I’d allow a minimum of six months to be safe. 

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