Fiancé Changes Groomsmen’s Suit Color. Doesn’t match theme.

posted 1 year ago in Themes
Post # 16
Member
1750 posts
Buzzing bee

longtobee :  OP wrote “I wanted the theme to resemble both me and my fiancé. I did this by letting my fiancé pick out everything he liked early in the planning process and then I coordinated everything else around that.”

Post # 17
Member
47202 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

The groom and groomsmen are not part of the decor.

Post # 18
Member
432 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

As a guest, it wouldn’t even occur to me to compare the color of the suits to any other part of the wedding. Gray and blush will look great together.

Post # 20
Member
1141 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

Take a deep breath and know that having the groomsmen in grey will compliment your bridesmaids’ dresses perfectly and that it is still in the monochrome color scheme! It sounds like it will all be beautiful! 

Post # 21
Member
4892 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

 They’ll take off their jackets at the reception anyway,so no one will see the grey, just their shirts. 

Post # 22
Member
4560 posts
Honey bee

People aren’t furniture.  There is no need to match people to decor.  You also are literally going to be the only person to even know the theme unless you are planning to make a sign like at the prom.  No one will even notice that something wasn’t what you really intended.  If people are standing around going “OMG, did something go wrong? The groomsmen look so soft compared to the contrasting dishes and napkins” then you have just thrown the most boring wedding ever.  No one notices this stuff…They notice the smiles on everyone’s faces and the good time that everyone is having.  That is what is going to shine through in people’s memories and your photos…Not whether your friends and family contrast enough with your centerpieces.

Post # 23
Member
3882 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

I mean, I agree with PPs that it will still look lovely and no one will care… but I do think it will change the look. We had light grey suits and pastel dresses and it was a very soft, romantic, slightly boho feel. Contrasting black feels a lot stronger and more formal. Both can be good but if you’ve planned the whole thing around this theme then I think it’s reasonable to not want to change it.

If it’s just a matter of wanting to stand out, would he be happy to stand out in a different way? He could have a different colour shirt, or different colours or combos of jacket/vest/tie/bowtie/suspenders…

Post # 24
Member
586 posts
Busy bee

I think it’ll look absolutely fine. In fact, it might even look better. You don’t want everything to be matching. And yeah I agree on the cake thing. I think a black cake is really going over the top… 

Post # 25
Member
176 posts
Blushing bee

I am personally on your side. You gave him the first pick so it is a bit unfair for him to change it so late! Have you asked for photos? Maybe place pictures of everything together and ask him if he thinks it goes? You don’t have to give him an ultimatum or be unfair, just talk about how you are feeling!

Post # 26
Member
658 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

 I don’t think gray would clash unless it’s super light gray. Maybe choose a darker/charcoal gray. And really, this is a minor thing, I would let Fiance go ahead with his ideas.

Post # 27
Member
3371 posts
Sugar bee

I think grey will be fine. But his blue suit is a bit strange with the color scheme. Why doesn’t he wear black and the groomsmen wear grey?

Post # 28
Member
1291 posts
Bumble bee

I think it is unfair that he just announced that he changed  his opinion on something that was already agreed. Especially since he was aware that you had based your love of themes around his decision. That being said, I think it will look fine with grey suits.

Post # 29
Member
2858 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

While I would probably be annoyed that he changed his mind so late in the game, this is really no biggie. Literally no one will care or notice that the guys are in gray. I do think a charcoal gray would look more appropriate with your “theme” but ultimately the bridal party members are NOT PROPS. They don’t have to match or coordinate to have a wedding.

Post # 30
Member
276 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

kristin36890 :  yep. And then he changed his mind. Tish happens. My fiance takes months to make decisions, so maybe I am just used to it. But giving him the time he needs, and allowing him to change his mind a million times makes him feel loved and supported. OP’s Fiance even relented more out of frustration than out of compromise. If my honey did that, I would step back and remember what all the planning is for, because making him feel loved and valued is so much more important than coordinating colors of one day. 

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