(Closed) Fiance confronted me about not liking my ring.. help

posted 6 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
438 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

This is something that is SUCH a sensitive topic. Next time he brings it up (if you bring it up out of the blue he might REALLY think it bothers you) explain to him, that it isn’t the ring that you would have picked out, but it isn’t ABOUT what you would have picked out. The time and thought he put into it is what really matters and you love what it REPRESENTS. If he really wants to get rid of it, and you want a new ring- go with it. But if you think he is going to be bitter later, then don’t let him think that’s even an option. I’m guessing you’d miss it if it was gone.

Post # 4
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

@MissLunchbox:  ditto.

It’s unfair to expect men to be mind readers, and select the exact ring of our dreams out of the millions of options available.  I would make it clear that you love the fact that it symbolizes him wanting to spend his life with you, and that you’re not angry with him for the fact that his choice didn’t exactly mirror what you had in mind.  But if he’s willing to replace it without being sad, I don’t think that’s a bad thing.

Post # 5
Member
65 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Yikes! I certainly don’t envy the position you are in. Its such a sensitive issue. I’m really sorry you don’t like the ring he picked out. Instead of thinking about the ring itself try to think about the effort and time and thought your Fiance put into it. Perhaps that will make it more special to you. Try to think about the fact that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you and was willing to go to the ends of the earth to get you something he hoped you liked. Men are terrible at fashion (with a few exceptions!) so maybe cut him a little slack.

I agree with SBurnes12, even if you don’t like the ring, I’m guessing you’ll miss it when its gone. it was THAT ring that he proposed with, it was THAT ring he picked out himself, it was THAT ring that encompasses all his time and effort and thought.

You’ve got some soul searching to do. If you decide to get a new one, try to say as tactfully as possible when HE brings it up. Then go to the store and see if there is anything you like before you pawn yours. If you decide you want to keep it, then occasionally mention without him bringing it up, how much it means to you that he went to such trouble and you can’t imagine anything better than having a FH that cares that much about you.

Post # 6
Member
65 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

btw, can we see it? I’m just being nosey..

Post # 7
Member
438 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m awfully curious now, too..

Post # 9
Member
724 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think your ring is gorgeous! What is it that you don’t like? 

Post # 11
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Boy I don’t envy you there, that is such a hard spot to be in. But, I think your ring is beautiful! It’s classic and elegant. What don’t you like about it? Are you wanting more bling? What does your wedding ring look like? Maybe you could have the diamond reset in a new setting? Let us know what you decide. Take care

Post # 12
Member
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

It’s a beautiful ring, but solitaires aren’t for everyone. You can easily get a different setting sometime down the line. Sorry you are going through this! 🙁

Post # 13
Member
438 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Definitely, he went with something that is pretty universal. Down the line you can always keep the stone and change the setting, or pick out a wedding band in your taste.

Post # 15
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: August 2010

If you aren’t happy with it, change it now before the wedding. Im sure he wants you to be happy with what you wear every day for the rest of your life.

Post # 16
Member
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I think it’s beautiful, because, well, solitaires are a classic!  I understand what you may feel, bc I’m not a big fan of solitaires to be honest, but they are beautiful anyway, and a big plus is that you can choose any wedding band to go with it, or a wrap, or just many thin bands.. you get the point.  That can make a simple solitaire look really amazing.

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