(Closed) Fiance did not get me the ring I wanted!

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
328 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

Maybe you should tell him you love it, but that you feel like he got screwed and paid way too much for it…what is the appraisal value vs what he paid…if he really got screwed and he complains maybe they will let yall trade it??

Post # 4
Member
2196 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

Well…I’d give the guy a break. I mean coming from someone that doesn’t know a lot about rings/diamonds what you described and what you got sound similar to me.  He was probably excited to get you a bigger stone as a lot of guys are about that stuff.

He already offered to exchange it, if I were you I’d just go and pick out your ring. If you’re going to be so specific you should just be there, otherwise he may just get you the “wrong” type of ring again.

That’s a bummer though, sorry it’s frustrating you.

Post # 6
Member
967 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

wow…..that’s all I can say….

do you know how much a diamond costs when it’s above H and has no visible imperfections?

My diamond is a G, no visible imperfections and my Fiance got a great deal on it….but still forked out almost $9000! If he had bought it anywhere else it would have been MUCH more…..then add taxes…..

Do you really want to hurt him about this? 

I just never understand women who are so determined to have a certain ring, and SUCH expensive ones!

 

Post # 7
Member
3668 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Honestly, guys don’t always pay as much attention to detail with stuff like this as we do. He probably just heard “yellow gold solitaire” and got what he thought fit the criteria.

I know you said you don’t want to pick out your own ring, but I really think you should take him up on that. That way you’re guaranteed to end up with something you love and he’s guaranteed not to disappoint you again.

Post # 9
Member
758 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@AlexandraO:  I get to keep nothing of that special moment when he proposed other than the memory of his nice words and the overly priced poor quality diamond in a setting I did not want.

Seriously? That’s nothing

Post # 11
Member
1444 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Just for the record, my ring has a hidden diamond on the inside of the band.  I never notice it.  It doesn’t rub my finger at all, and hasn’t ever fallen out.  Actually, now that I think about it, I’ve got one of those diamonds on BOTH my engagement and wedding band…that is how little I think about them and how little they bother me.  ??  Unless it is a huge honker of a hidden diamond (and I’m not sure why any jeweler would put a giant gem on the inside of a band for obvious reasons), I don’t forsee that being a problem.

He probably thought he was going above and beyond what you were asking for…give the guy a break.  I’d be so sad if I bought someone I loved a wonderful, thoughtful, heartfelt gift and they turned their nose up at it.

Post # 12
Member
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

This makes me sad. I think you should just pick it out yourself since you want something so specific. 

Post # 13
Member
2874 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@AlexandraO:  i think he probably did the best he could. it sounds like he did pick up on most of the major points

hes probably quite hurt that you so blatantly dont like it, and to be honest it makes more sense for you to pick it out with him. you’re getting the rest of your life with the man you love – a man who wants to make the ultimate committment. thats not nothing, its everything 🙂

edit – how much does he know about diamonds? for me to check everything on that list id need it written down, theres no way id remember it as i dont know much about rings. i dont think its thoughtless necessarily, if i had to get a special man thing like…a car with special engine things etc, id probably mess it up

Post # 14
Member
1152 posts
Bumble bee

I know you said you didn’t want to pick out your own ring, but………… didn’t you?

He didn’t quite get the hint – some guys just aren’t that detail-oriented. He remembered the yellow gold – all those specifics might have flown right over his head.

If it’s upsetting you that much, I’d take him up on his offer and just go pick a new one with him. It’s not so unromantic – you’re still picking it together, right? But if you’re a traditionalist and want the romantic sentiment of your man choosing your ring… keep the one you’ve got! He picked it with you on his mind. I don’t think you can really have both worlds in this case.

Post # 15
Member
758 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@AlexandraO:  I can see how that would be frustrating.  But I honestly think PPs are right – if you’re going to be so specific, I think you need to cut the guy a break and pick out what you want, since you know that the best. 🙂

Post # 16
Member
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’d give him a break. I understand where you’re coming from, don’t get me wrong, and it’s unfortunate that the ring isn’t what you wanted. Usually, we don’t understand how men comprehend things and the emotions that they feel. My Fiance expressed his excitement as he was looking at rings for me. I bet yours was also very excited as he was looking at rings for you. It’s frustrating sometimes, I know. Sometimes we ask them to go to the grocery store and bring a head of lettuce, and they come back with a head of cabbage. Try not to make him feel bad about it since I’m sure he already feels terrible about the whole thing. I hope everything works out

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