- 4 months ago
- Wedding: August 2012
beenonynmous : Have you ever tried to have a direct conversation with her? Before deciding on whether or not to invite her, you need to talk to her. Secondhand information from family is only making this situation worse. For all you know, you inadvertently offended her the first time you met and all she needs is an apology. There are two sides to every story and I doubt she hates you for no reason.
Meet her in person for a drink and say something like “hey, it seems to me that you dislike me and I don’t understand why. Is there anything I can do to make things better between us? We both have to be in this family and I would like our interactions to be more cordial than they were over the holidays…”
Avoid accusations, stick to “I/me” statements. Do not text. Be sure to acknowledge that she is also part of your fiancé’s family. Maybe just ask her to think it over, not give you an answer at that moment.
Having a conversation with her first is the only way to make a decision about the invite. Depending on how things go, you can then not invite her with a clear conscience. Or maybe you’ll actually resolve things and be able to have a civil relationship going forward. It’s worth a try.