Fiance made out with another woman at a wedding, looking for advise.

posted 1 year ago in Emotional
Post # 75
Member
530 posts
Busy bee

cc0990 :  Just now saw your update. I am glad to hear you put a hold on things until you figure out what’s best for you. Good luck bee! 

Post # 76
Member
1815 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I’ve never been black out drunk. But as my husband puts it, he has been incredibly drunk and you still have control over your actions. Saying you cheated cos you were drunk isn’t an excuse.

Not ok. I wouldn’t dump someone over it but it’s concerning 

Post # 77
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2017

MiaSuperstar :  Yup.  Same here.  Before we got engaged, I was horribly drunk on work night out and a colleague kissed me.  I didn’t put an end to it as quickly as I should have.  I have ZERO feelings for this person, I ADORE my fiance. I confessed the next day (no one saw, I confessed because I couldn’t live with it being a secret) he managed to forgive me and we are VERY happy together.  I know I will never put myself in a similar situation again.

A lot of people here are saying that alcohol doesn’t make you do things you don’t want do to and that may be the case for them.  However, for me, if I drink too much it turns me into a different person and I do and say things I would never dream of saying/doing sober. Only you can know if this is something you can forgive but I can’t even express how grateful I am that my fiance was able to get over what I did.

Post # 78
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2018

You need to get to the root of what happened. Why did he make out with another woman? Is he – as others have suggested – a cheater who only told you because he figured you’d find out anyways? Does he have an issue with alcohol and need to sober up? Is he nervous about the engagement and felt the need to self sabotage?

These are reasons but not acceptable excuses. If you want to continue with the relationship, you need to figure out why he did what he did, and what steps he’ll take to fix that.

Post # 79
Member
622 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

If you had been standing right next to him and he’d been blackout drunk, would he have still done it? No? Then he was able to control himself and he just chose not to. 

Post # 81
Member
616 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

landy :  I literally don’t remember anything! I am one of those annoying drunken people who loves the world and anybody – literally anybody – on it. 

My finace now husband stood right next to me and some friends. I didn’t know what happend until he told me two days later. I felt so bad I can’t even describe it. Uh I hated myself and part of me is darn happy that there’s no memory of it all. 😂 🙄 

But he forgave me. And I try to get a grip on my Jägermeister input. Works most of the time. 😇 

As I said. Shit happens. Shit should not repeat itself though. 

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