Fiancé may have tried to cheat/things online in the past

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 32
Member
539 posts
Busy bee

stripthatdown :  Did you end up talking to him, bee? I really don’t see how you can avoid having a serious conversation here, with him answering all your questions. Personally I wouldn’t be able to believe his answers, but nevertheless…

Post # 34
Member
293 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

stripthatdown :  

Yes, this does get bumped to the top of the forums.

I just read your whole post for the first time. One of the bees a couple pages back warned you that exactly this would happen – that he would turn it around and blame you for lying and not actually trying to fix the relationship. But as she also said, it’s his fault not yours. Please go reread all of the advice you were given before because it all still applies. Even more so now.. I can’t believe you haven’t left him yet. You deserve better!!! DTMFA

Post # 35
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2018 - Fremont, CA

Omg don’t submit to this!

DTMF!!!!!

Post # 36
Member
4658 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

DTMF!! I agree with the PPs. He’s horrible. Go from kinda broken up to I’VE LEFT THAT LOSER AND DESERVE BETTER.

Post # 38
Member
4658 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

Good riddance. Don’t waste your pretty on a cheating loser. Believe you deserve better and you will get it.

Post # 39
Member
2342 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

stripthatdown :  I’m glad you broke up. I know it hurst but you can do SO much better and not have to feel this anxiety again

Post # 40
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

stripthatdown :  Gross.  What a disasterpuss. Breaking up is terrible, but a lifetime of living with that betrayal and manipulation would have been so much worse.  

Post # 41
Member
357 posts
Helper bee

stripthatdown :  You literally said “I even feel crazy.” That’s called gaslighting and that’s a form of emotional abuse. Please let that sink in. Good for you for breaking up. Stay broken up and stay strong.

Post # 43
Member
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

stripthatdown :  He’s a jerk.

Just think if you were to stay with him. How bored he would get with just reaching out to women. The next thrill would be to meet up with one. Then when he got bored with that he would physically cheat.

It’s a slippery slope. I’m glad you’re done with this POS.

Post # 44
Member
812 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - Farm

He’s trying to manipulate you in order to control you and hope that you would forget what he has done. Just because he said he had changed doesn’t mean that he had. If he had changed so much he wouldn’t have gotten made about you still thinking about it. You’ve done the right thing. Don’t take him back move on. I know that he has moved out but please have your locks changed. Don’t just take his key back change the locks. You will be okay.

Post # 45
Member
1596 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

stripthatdown :  Hon, that’s how guys like that operate.  They do stuff they know is wrong and the expectation is that you “need to get over it”.  You try to talk about it and it’s “oh you’re bringing that up again!”  This is manipulation and misdirection…because he knows it hasn’t been resolved but doesn’t want to take responsibility.  Any time your legit feelings are being blown off or brushed aside, you should know something is up.  Chalk this up as a lesson learned and pay closer attention to actions and not words okay bee?

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