Fiancé moving in with another woman?

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Should I somehow learn to live with this leading right up to our wedding?
    Yes, this is no big deal. : (104 votes)
    41 %
    Yes, but with conditions. : (27 votes)
    11 %
    No, I would not like this at all. : (118 votes)
    47 %
    Other : (3 votes)
    1 %
  • Post # 91
    Member
    621 posts
    Busy bee

    serickson711 :  not to split hairs here, but I’ve read the Bible thru a few times in my life and I’ve never read that verse about forbidding people to be alone together. I wouldn’t be ok with it, but the Bible doesn’t forbid that. Sorry, kind of off topic, but…🤷🏻‍♀️

    Post # 92
    Member
    10944 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: City, State

    amanda1988 :  

    Core difference:  you’re a woman.  They were men.  Biological realities were in play.

    The physical proximity of an attractive woman is a different experience for a young heterosexual man than the reverse is for a young heterosexual woman.

    That said, plenty of men and women can live together platonically.  What I’m not understanding here is why this is the fi’s only option.  It would be different if this were a female friend of long standing.

    Post # 93
    Member
    9570 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2016

    sassy411 :  OK?  But they were men living with an attractive* woman and managed to not end up cheating on their girlfriends?

    *I was pretty fucking hot at the time.  Eating healthy and running 30 miles a week and brushing my hair and all that jazz.

    Post # 94
    Member
    10026 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: City, State

    amanda1988 :  Hey now, you’re still pretty fuckin’ hot! To be fair and all. 

    Post # 95
    Member
    2467 posts
    Buzzing bee

    You know.. the title of this thread kind of bothers me.  “Fiance moving in with another woman” has such a different connotation than “Fiance has to move in with a roommate”.  

    Post # 97
    Member
    428 posts
    Helper bee

    annarose2 :  that’s a no from me. Had a bf once who moved in with a woman who posted on Craigslist for a roommate. Similar situation to yours in that they did not know each other previously and I hadn’t met her til he moved in. They ended up sleeping together and she got pregnant. Their child is 12 now, though they never officially dated. Ha. 

    Post # 98
    Member
    410 posts
    Helper bee

    sassy411 :  

    “First Canon of Committed Relationships:  don’t put yourself in stupid situations”

    Agreed!

    Post # 99
    Member
    1637 posts
    Bumble bee

    Honestly if your fiance really is the type of guy to cheat on you with his female roommate, better to find out now before you marry the guy and he cheats on you with someone else. Like if he doesn’t have the good sense to be able to size up whether she’s someone he has chemistry with and then share an apartment or not, it’s a matter of time before it’s like a coworker or your kid’s friend’s mom.

    Post # 100
    Member
    8552 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    Newgirl87 :  

    I wouldn’t even liked my Darling Husband to share a car with a woman everyday! Not that I don’t trust him, but why play with fire  “  

    Good Lord,  playing with fire,  seriously!?  That must make life very difficult  , I mean think of all the elevators and buses and the tube and offices and close encounters on the street even!

     

    Post # 101
    Member
    777 posts
    Busy bee

     

    This is a strange one for me. I would be okay with this if my ex had to do this. But my current SO, NO WAY! My current SO is the kind of man many women want and will literally throw themselves on him. Though I do trust him not to slip, but I don’t even want to think about someone strutting around the apartment in a lewd bikini, teasing him.

    Post # 102
    Member
    132 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2019

    Absolutely not!! I don’t care how much you trust him or how wonderful he is. If she is even a little bit attractive, you are playing with fire. Just my opinion. 

    Post # 103
    Member
    45 posts
    Newbee

    Yes you would be the first girl he lives with.  Having a roommate of the opposite sex isn’t the same thing you’re talking about. Do you trust him? If you do, I say don’t stand in his way. Would I be uncomfortable? Yes, a little bit, but if this is THE guy and he feels the same way about you, why put a wrinkle in an already great relationship. 

    Post # 104
    Member
    45 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    I think it would bug me. Are they friends or are they complete strangers?

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