(Closed) Fiance was let go today

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
915 posts
Busy bee

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beachbride2bee:  He might need to focus on finding a job and after things get settled and ya’ll have a savings focus on finding a career. If he focus on finding something that he got his degree in, he may stay unemployed for awhile. 

Good luck though. Everything will work out in the end. As far as the wedding goes, see what cuts you can make first before postponing again. 

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 10 months ago by Shoot4theMoon. Reason: Phone makes up words :/
Post # 3
Member
5092 posts
Bee Keeper

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beachbride2bee:  Are there cuts that you can make?  Maybe keep the photographer, but find a less expensive venue? If you are serving alcohol, could you choose one or two signature drinks instead of having an open bar? Are there other cuts you can make?  -Maybe DIY your invitations, cut favors? Use less flowers, or something?  If you post some specifics, we could help you brainstorm.  He may have to take a different type of work for the meantime, and keep applying elsewhere.  

 

Post # 4
Member
5092 posts
Bee Keeper

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beachbride2bee:  How many people were you inviting?  Can you cut the guest list at all? Or did you already send out Save-The-Dates?

Post # 5
Member
2127 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012 - Southern California

I would wait like two months before you make any rash decisions regarding the wedding. Give your Fiance a little time to find a new job, then go from there.

Be patient & positive ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 6
Member
2284 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Ketchum, ID

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beachbride2bee:  You can do what we did: we cut our guest list to our very closest family and friends. We’re spending about $8k, but that’s only because we went with a pretty expensive venue/area, and got accommodations for all of our friends, etc. 

Post # 7
Member
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

This happened to me last year. I spent 9 months waitressing (with a doctorate) before I found the job I’m in now. It was a terrible job search and I was so depressed. We had just had an emergency that took a big bite out of our savings too, so it was really tight for a while.

Just remember that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel: he WILL find a job, its just a function of how long he’s willing to wait and how close to his ideal job he’s willing to settle for. He’s well educated, there are plenty of places that just want to see the degree regardless of what it’s in. So don’t stress too much about that ๐Ÿ™‚

My biggest advice to you is to not make him feel guilty about your money troubles (he will blame himself enough already). With that said… the responsible thing for him to do is get short-term employment to help pay the bills and maintain your savings. I’ll warn you now, if he goes that route it is a bigger blow to someone’s pride then you can even imagine until you’re in that situation. I literally had nightmares about people in my doctoral program coming in while I was waitressing. My husband was my rock during that time. He always kept me focusing on the future instead of the crappy present, and worked really hard to keep my spirits up. Even when I turned down “OK” job offers because I was waiting for something I could make a career of, he still supported me and didn’t make me feel bad about wanting that for myself. Unconditional support and gentleness is probably the best thing you can give your fiance.

-hugs- it’s only temporary, everything will work out

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 10 months ago by CountryRose.
Post # 9
Member
6331 posts
Bee Keeper

Hopefully, he’ll find a job soon although I don’t know if the hire patterns correlate with school sessions. You still have several months before the wedding. I think it’s appropriate to lay low with the wedding planning for now while things are up in the air. If push comes to shove with finances, you can always scale your wedding way down or elope. 

Post # 10
Member
5092 posts
Bee Keeper

I googled and found a possible back-up place for you in case you find that you need it-Not sure how much it could save you, but you can BYOB.   As of now, it still has some January 2016 Sunday dates available. I will Private Message it to you.   

Post # 11
Member
1883 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Sigh… I am looking for work as well, AGAIN… Anyway, I think that you can cut down on your wedding budget to bare minimums outside of the venue. Get creative and DIY as much as you can. Use faux flowers, have a relative be your officiant, use cupcakes instead of a regular wedding cake, and cut down on your guest list (the number one way to cut costs). As far as a job is concerned, perhaps he ought to look for a job in Finance for the time being. There are many jobs that pay well in the field. He needs to be much less rigid on the title of the job. Many folks find something that they love outside of what they studied in school, and that is something to consider. I hope everything works out for you guys! 

Post # 12
Member
5092 posts
Bee Keeper

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beachbride2bee:  Just wondering, what do you want your invitations to look like.  There are several free printable ones I have found online.  

Post # 14
Member
5985 posts
Bee Keeper

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beachbride2bee:  While I have no wedding advice for you I just wanted to say how sorry I am for you! I hope everything works out.

Post # 15
Member
988 posts
Busy bee

I just want to let you know that I have been there! Just last May DH was let go from a job he had been with for 16 YEARS!! No compensation, no severence pay, nothing. I am a stay at home mom so there was no income at all. Luckily we had savings. DH started a new job in September. I am not going to tell you that it is going to be easy, it’s not! And it will put a strain on your relationship – it did ours. But if you are strong TOGETHER, you will prevail and you will be stronger on the other side of this. I wish you all the luck and hope he finds something soon.

Michaels and AC Moore have DIY invitations. I am not sure what craft stores are in your area. 

 

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