(Closed) Fiance/Photographer Drama

posted 8 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
125 posts
Blushing bee

Not cool! Free means free, and I would have seen that as a wedding gift. The fact that you are covering his accomodation, in my eyes, is sufficient. If he wanted to be reimbursed for his other expenses, he should have stated this way in advance so that you weren’t in this awkward position so close to the wedding. 

I would say “thank you, but no thank you” to him. It’s not worth getting yourself into debt when you already have a professional photographer organised.

Post # 4
412 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@KAT3:  Does your pro photographer have anything in the contract abotu not allowing another pro photographer there?  I know my videographer has that, so it might be a good thing to check.  I’m not sure you should have to pay for gas for his “scenic tour.”  Is there a more direct route from where he’s coming?  If so, I’d tell him you’d cover that but not the tour.  And even so, there’s a mileage reembursement that’s usually used (http://www.irs.gov/newsroom/article/0,,id=250882,00.html) that I’ve been paid back with that should absolutely not come up to 400$.  Overall, it’s really crappy he said he’d do it for free and is now slapping unexpected expenses on you.

Post # 5
598 posts
Busy bee

Yeah… I would “fire” him.

Post # 6
1067 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’ve heard that it’s risky buisness to use your friend as your photographer. Too much drama can come from that. You should politely fire him.

Post # 7
484 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Wow, that is terrible! I would certainly decline his services, informing him that the offer of free photography was indeed a nice gesture, but his extra costs are not something you had factored into your already large budget. 

On a side note, $300-400 in gas seems excessive. I get reimbursed by my job for all the driving I do (roughly 3-4 hours a day) at $0.52/km. I would heed the advice of the above poster who suggested using a milegae calculator. My expenses for work usually end up being around $200-250/month, so his quote for an 8-hour drive are ridiculous!. If you do decide to have him there, explain that you will not pay for his “scenic route” tour, but you will reimburse him at X-cents/mile or km for the exact distance it would take for him to get to/from the cermony from his home. 

On second thought, was he intended to be a guest at your wedding prior to the offer? If so, do not reimburse him for any of this, and just bump him back down to guest status. This is absurd the more I sit here and write this post. I would be furious. “free” means “free” not “free ride, free hotel, free expense account for me on the dime of the bride and groom”. 


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