Fiancé's aunt performing ceremony – weird or not?

posted 3 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 16
2679 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012 - Southern California

My uncle married us and nobody thought it was weird! Can your friend/pastor not get ordained online? That’s what my uncle did. We’re in California though and I know it differs state by state.

Post # 17
6529 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

 alliebamabride :  Father-In-Law also wasn’t ordained and did not want to get an online ordination as he felt that wasn’t ‘real’ per his own beliefs.  We did a quick run to the courthouse a couple of days before for legality.  We still consider FIL’s marrying us to be the real ceremony, the real marriage.  Might be another option for you as well.

Post # 18
185 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2017

alliebamabride :  My Dad is performing mine, so I don’t think it’s weird for his aunt to do it. But if that’s not what you want (and it sounds like it isn’t), then I think there are a couple different options that might work…

Get legally married at a JoP/Courthouse then have your religious figure do the ceremony. 

Get a family member or friend to get ordained online — it’s free and can be done in 5 minutes. Then have the religious ceremony you want, followed by the ordained person joining the ceremony to do just the legal vow part. My understanding is that there’s a very minimal part which is required, so I think most of the personal vows can still be done by your church guy.

Or, have the religious figure do the entire ceremony and when it gets to the legal vow part, have the closest people (parents, MoH, etc) all do a piece of the vows i.e. Mom says “Do you promise to care for Allie in sickness and in health,” Dad says “do you promise to love, honor and respect Allie for as long as you both shall live,” and then the one who is ordained is the one who says “By the power vested in me by the state of Alabama, I now pronounce you husband and wife. 

I think as long as the officiant hears the vows agreed to and says the power vested in me part, it’s all good. 

Post # 19
9607 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

i don’t think it’s wierd at all.  I’ve been to wedding where family members performed the ceremony (or friends) and always felt they were particularly special.


(For one thing, except for the one time when the father was a pastor by profession and probably performed ceremonies all the time, they’re so much more emotional!)

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