Post # 1
So I think she is a little young for a bridesmaid, seeing as she won’t be able to do bachelorette stuff with us (I only have two bridesmaids, my closest friends) and isn’t really involved in planning.
For those of you who have had female bridal party members around this age, what did you make them? Bridesmaid? Junior bridesmaid? If junior bridesmaid, than do you have her wear the same dress the BMs do, or choose something else?
Thanks for any advice you can give.
Post # 3
I’m not having a bridal party, but if I were in your position, I would do one of these:
-Make her a reader-Make her a bridesmaid and do a bachelorette thing that she could be involved in (in addition to your more adult celebration if you can’t bear to give up the drinking and such)…though she may not mind being excluded from it if she’s the type to feel uncomfortable around older people or people she doesn’t know.
My sister-in-law had 2 bridesmaids under age 21 (me and another girl), so they took a limo to a place that allowed underage people and provided drinks for people who were of age (I think it was a drag show? lol). I chose not to go because I don’t like being around drunk people and I didn’t know the other bridesmaids well enough to feel comfortable hanging out with them. The other underage girl went and I assume she had a good time.
ETA-I just really hate the whole junior bridesmaid thing, so I always advise against it lol.
Post # 4
I was a bridesmaid at 16 for a brother of mine. I had no issue skipping the adult stuff if it meant I got to be included in the wedding and dress up!
Post # 5
my daughter is 15..and i have 3 necies same age or younger.. the necies are Jr bms.
My daughter wanted to be a bridesmaid to be part of everything- we just arent including her in the bacholorette and shes beyond thrilled!
she gets to wear a more grown up dress then the other girls and she had say in the dress and a bunch of wedding items!
Post # 6
I would make her a junior bridesmaid. I didn’t have any bridesmaids that were considered junior, but I had friends as traditional bridesmaids and then our 3 sisters didn’t specifically have a title. The bridesmaids all wore matching dresses and the sisters wore a different color and the dress of their choosing.
Post # 7
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
I’d have her as a junior bridesmaid, in the same dress, or at least color (if the bridesmaid’s dresses are too “mature,” she can wear something similar)
Post # 8
My sister is 15 and she is a bridesmaid – not a “junior” bridesmaid. All of my BM’s are wearing different style dresses, and hers is a little more conservative (not low cut). She doesn’t really help with planning and of course she won’t be able to attend the bachelorette party, but I still wanted her to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. 🙂
Post # 9
I would ask her to be a bridesmaid. I think a junior bridesmaid is for girls about 8-13. After that, they are past the age of wanting to look cute- they want to dress up like youg women.
I doubt that she will care if you do an adult bachelorette and don’t invite her.
Or, you could do a two part event. All the girls could have a mani/pedi, then dinner. After that the adults could go out for drinks.
Post # 10
Mine was my sister, she is 16, and she was a bridesmaid. She wore the exact same dress as everyone else. I do the whole bar hopping thing once or twice a month with my girls and I knew it wouldn’t really stop when I got married. I’m not about going crazy with the drinking because I hate being hung over. So I opted for a relaxing day at the spa for the bachelorette party. I can also do that whenever, but I sorely needed it.
If you are 16 years of age you have to be accompanied by an adult at most spas, you have to be 18 to get a massage since you will be basically nude and someone is touching you. She was able to do everything with us, except drink (they had a bar with yummy drinks at the spa) and she was fine with that.
She was very much apart of the planning process, especially during the bridal shower. She even helped tied up my corset gown on the day of as she was the only one that really knew how! I love my little sister!!! 😀
Post # 11
I think bridesmaid makes the most sense. Just because she’s a Bridesmaid or Best Man doesn’t mean she has to be a part of the bachelorette party. I was my sister’s Maid/Matron of Honor when I was 16 so another friend did the adult stuff like the bachelorette party. And in my wedding, I have my 2 nieces as junior BMs at ages 13 and 9.
Post # 12
I have a 10 year old junior bridesmaid. She’s so excited, it’s redic. Since I’m having the girls pick out a black dress, she’s doing the same.
I would think at 15, she’s mature enough to understand she cant do all the adult things but that it is a big honor to take part in it.
Post # 13
She’s old enough to be a bridesmaid so that’s what I would do. Yes she can’t do the Bach party but so what. Don’t let yourself get hung up on the small stuff!
Post # 14
I have six bridesmaids – 4 of my friends and my 2 FSILs. My FSILs will be 18 & 13 when we get married. They’re not coming to the bachelorette, but they are full-fledged bridesmaids. I thought the 13yr old might need a jr bridesmaids dress, but turned out to be a women’s 00. All my bridesmaids selected different styles from the same line, so it wasn’t going to be a problem anyway.
Post # 15
@julies1949: I agree with Julies!
My daughter is 14 and would be so insulted if she was named a junior bridesmaid. At 14, and especially 15, the girls are definitely young adults and not little girls anymore. My daughter is wearing the same dress and to my FI’s dismay the same shoes as the other girls. My daughter is my Maid/Matron of Honor and my two sisters are the Matrons of Honor and than I have 5 BMs.
As for the bachelorette we are doing a spa day and a party night. She is obviously coming to the spa and will just come to dinner with my mom and Mother-In-Law before we take off for whatever may come. 🙂
Post # 16
Thanks for the input, guys. I’m thinking about just making her a full-fledged bridesmaid based on what you have said. (She already knows she is in the wedding, just doesn’t have a title yet.) I’m having the older girs wear a full-length pale brown chiffon dress from DB that I think would still be appropriate for FI’s sister!