Post # 1
My SO currently lives 4 hours away with his grandparents. I was intending on renting a car for saturday through monday so I could visit him. My driving experience isnt the greatest. The farthest I think I have drived is at least an hour. I get very panicky driving in rain especially on the highway. My parents do not want me driving 4 hours down there because they claim I dont have enough experience driving in a big city that I have to pass through to get there and because they think its dangerous. I want to see him so badly so I had suggested that my dad drive me halfway so my SO could meet up with me and pick me up. My SO is mad at me because he says Im a scaredycat and that he knows I can do this. Be that as it may I dont want to go and risk my parents being angry at me because of it. Also I am not that fond of driving long distances in the first place which is why I suggested he meet me halfway. Well he said he hasnt got the money mainly because his crappy truck guzzles gas like no other. It would cost him around $160 to drive up and back to meet me and then back again to take me back. This greatly upsets me and now hes mad at me because he’s irritated because I wont stand up for myself. I want to be with him this weekend. We havent seen each other in a month and this is the only time he would have to see me.:( I just need some encouragement. Please…this has caused a pretty bad argument the whole week and I am tired of going around the world about it. I even offered to pay for his gas but he wont accept my money.:'( Also the city that i would be passing through on the bypass is known as “death valley” and is a very scary road to drive on especially with all its high traffic and pouring down rain.I want to be with him but every time I mention me just renting a car and driving down, my mom goes into a fit and gets very mad at me and I cant control my emotions hardly at all when shes like this. She doesnt understand that I have to do this. I love my SO more than anything and just want to be with him. But itll cost me alot of money to rent a car and drive down there.
Post # 3
@katiecat08: More than upset, I think he is hurt. He wants to see you too!
Can you take a bus or a train or something?
Post # 4
@katiecat08: Can you take the bus?
Post # 5
You can’t get better if you don’t ever try.
He’s hurt. You’re not willing to put your own fears aside to see him. Being scared is one thing, trying to get out of it is another.
I can relate, though. My husband (then boyfriend) asked me to fly halfway across the country to see him. I had never flown alone before, I have a fear of flying, and I had never been more than an hour or two away from my family at any given time during my life.
I sucked it up, realized I wanted to see him more than I was scared and flew 1,200 miles to see him.
Best decision I ever made.
You can’t spend your life with your parents doing things for you because you’re scared. If you don’t want to drive, get a bus or train ticket. Don’t ask your parents to drive you — Daddy won’t be around to do the scary things forever.
Post # 6
I’m not sure how old you are but from your post you sound a bit immature.
if I was your SO I would be pretty upset too !
Post # 7
@katiecat08: My FI and I live 8 hours apart right now and he would visit every other weekend and eventually I saw how exhausted he was so I had to get over it and drive up and see him even though driving that far alone freaked me out too. I found an audiobooked help keep me calm and happy and I just turned the volume down when I needed to focus.
Post # 8
can you take a bus or amtrak?
Post # 9
@katiecat08: I’m not sure why other bees are pressuring you to do this. If you’re a new driver than this may be really unsafe for you. Plus he wants to see you but he won’t spend $160 to do so although I’m sure it’s going to cost you more than that just to rent the car, put in gas, and not to mention your own fear and the damage it will do to your parents. I think your SO is being selfish. He should figure out a way to come pick you up half way take a bus up to you and drive back down with you.
Post # 10
I’m considering a bus, at this point we arent getting better and the distance is killing us. I tried finding a schedule for amtrak but the times arent good.
Post # 11
Ive got an idea. Taking a bus directly down there would take longer than driving so Im considering getting my dad to drive me down to at least a place about 2 hours from his place because i dont want him wasting all his gas. I take the bus the rest of the way down there. It doesnt cost much and the bus ride is only 1 hour and 45 minutes. I’ll pay my so for his gas when he takes me back to meet my dad halfway. My parents are only concerned for my safety because I havent really driven in huge cities hardly at all and get very nervous when I do.
Post # 12
If you don’t mind me asking, how old are you & how long have you been driving?
Post # 13
@katiecat08: so now you’re not driving at all, getting your dad actively involved in your LDR , you still have to take a bus, and making your SO drive when you haven’T to pick you up.
Doesnt sound like a win win to me. But if it works for you ….this just sounds very immature to me.
Post # 14
[content moderated for trolling]
Post # 15
You know what..you dont know my family or my life. I am 23 years old and have been driving since I was 18 but I am still a nervous driver always have been. I do not like driving in rain and I dont like the highway we have around here because lots of accidents happen on it. My dad loves my SO and hes willing to help out. Just because I’m asking him for help now does not mean I am always going to ask for help again! My mom is already under a lot of pressure with my grandpa nearly dying so I really dont want to add onto her plate anymore than it is! So thank you but no thank you for your “advice”. All I wanted was someone to hear me out not criticize or judge me when you dont even know me! I have been working at a bank ever since i got out of high school, I lived with my sister for 2 years before we were required to move back home due to family renovations. I cant afford to rent myself an apartment right at this moment or else i would which is why I still live at home.