(Closed) Fighting over my dress

posted 7 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Hostess
23599 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@missyjane77: Oh wow.  I mean….he KIND OF has a point, but he could’ve had way more tact than that.  His tone (apparently) came across as super selfish!  Hopefully things boil over – that being said, I’m sure he will love ANY dress you put on!

Post # 4
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@missyjane77:How mature of him!  Honestly this doesn’t sound like a guy ready to get married or he’s stressing over something else and taking it out in the wrong places.

Post # 5
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

so whats he planning on doing, see you walk down the aisle and then make the decision if the dress (and you) is marry worthy???

although i understand that women dress for themselves and their partner i think to dictate what you wear is worrying – does he try to control other things about you?

Post # 7
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@missyjane77:You shouldn’t have to pick a dress out that is what HE wants, it’s going on YOUR body.  I can understand a lot of girls on here will say they picked a dress that they know there Fiance would like but lets be realistic.  You could find a dress that your think your Fiance is going to be amazed by but in the end what if he hates it?  It shouldn’t matter as long as you’re happy with your dress and he’s happy with his tux/suit.  I picked out my dress based on MY style and MY tastes.  I never once tried something on and said “OH Fiance is going to HATE this!”  I know my Fiance will be happy with whatever I decide to wear because it’s a representation of who I am and he loves who I am.

Post # 8
Hostess
23599 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@missyjane77: I should have told you earlier that my Fiance has also been caught saying something to that degree.  He was a LOT nicer about it, but he did imply that he should enjoy the dress I choose.  He’s very anti fluff and blingy – lucky for him, so am I.  BUT!  He was sure he wanted me in an A-line/ballgown, and I ended up with a trumpet dress!  I had to show him a whole bunch of photos of little asian girls in trumpet gowns to ease my own tentativeness of going against what I knew he loved, and lucky for me, he loved all of the dresses!

My Fiance also was convinced that all bridal gowns MUST be pure white.  I had nothing of it.  To sum it up?  Sometimes boys dream too.  They’re big girls at heart, and have dreams about their wedding day too.  I forgive it!

Post # 9
Member
1335 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Wow. He’s marrying you, not a dress. Since you said it’s the first time he’s ever spoken to you like this, I think you guys need to have a discussion about what he said and why he said it. Hopefully he didn’t mean what he said to sound so harsh.

Post # 10
Member
263 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

WTF?  I sure hope you ripped him a new one.  

@Golden139:  Couldn’t agree more.  This needs to be nipped in the bud. 

Post # 11
Member
1013 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I had picked out a dress then showed a pic of it to Fiance along with a few others asking his opinion. He said he didnt like that one (not knowing that I had almost 100% decide on it). It was a ball gown and he told me that with my figure he thinks I would get lost in a dress like that and when he envisions me on our wedding day I am always wearing something more fitted. He like a more fit and flare look. Which is now what I am consdiering since it is his day as well and I was to look the way he envisions it.

Post # 12
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i can see the whole… making sure that his opinion comes into account since it’s HIS wedding also…. and vice versa for the tux.

But… any guy who doesn’t think his fiance looks beautiful when he sees her in her dress is not a guy i would want to marry.

And if he’s serious about not marrying you if he doesn’t like the dress… like he’ll seriously walk out if he doesn’t like the dress…  he’s either a total douche or he’s having some cold feet issues.

Post # 13
Member
3004 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

@missyjane77:ugh, I’m so sorry! That’s so awful. When Fiance and I were still dating, he told me that if I EVER bought a strapless dress, or anything he considered immodest he would walk right out of the ceremony and not marry me. Oh man, that did not go over well.

Post # 13
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

“if he doesn’t like my dress, he won’t marry me

Is he looking for an excuse to call off the wedding?

Post # 13
Member
2947 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

…whoa! My Fiance said pretty much what nycbrde said, but he also said that more important than anything was that I felt good in it.

It really sounds like you two need to chat…this might go beyond the dress. :/ ::hugs:: I’m sorry.

Post # 14
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I get that he should like your dress and all, but threatening not to marry you over it.. really??!!

I want my Fiance to think i look beautiful dont get me wrong, but he has said on multiple occasions that it doesnt matter what dress i buy, he is just looking forward to me walking down the aisle toward him. He even said i could be wearing a bin bag and i’d still be his bride. 

I am sure your Fiance will feel like this too, and he’ll love you in whatever dress you buy!

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