(Closed) FIL inviting every single work colleague!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
993 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Oh dear… this is happening at our wedding too and unfortunately I’ve just accepted it as part of life.  I think due to the political nature of working and your Fi’s family having a company, it would be appropriate to be welcoming towards them.  This is a chance to host and “care for” them.  We’re inviting almost 100 ppl extra with FI’s colleagues and their partners.  Alot of them may not come because it is a bit of a boring social situation/obligation.  I’m hoping they leave after dinner and just actual friends stick around.

Bonus: technically you can write off the costs for these guests as a work expense and the company can pay for them (if Father-In-Law or Fiance is paying).

Post # 4
5475 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

If they’re paying, they get a say in the guest list.  That said, if this is a capacity issue, kindly bring it up (or better yet, have Fiance bring it up) and remind them that it would be awfully embarrassing to have the reception shut down due to a fire code or capacity violation!

Post # 5
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Business should stay business. Not only that but the employees may not even want to go but feel forced too. That crazy there no reason to invite the whole company to a personal event like that, and especially if you don’t have space for it at your venue.

Post # 6
2188 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

If I was an employee who got invited to the wedding I would feel obligated to go or send a gift and if I’ve never met the son I would honestly hate to do this and waste my money on someone I’ve never met! I think Father-In-Law should take in to account that many people would feel like this if they haven’t ever met your Fiance.

Post # 7
6222 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

If I were an employee, I would feel weird about this, especially if he hadn’t met them at all. Does he already work there?

Post # 9
4284 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

It is a little strange if these people haven’t even met your Fiance. What does he think about all of this?

Post # 10
1876 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Could you ask that it possible be kept to top-level execs only? Inviting everyone (and plus ones) makes the party into a company party! I would just explain that it might be overkill, AND could put his employees in the awkward position of feeling like they need to give a gift. I think Fiance should speak with his father about triming the list. Let this be FI’s fight and try not to get too involved.

Post # 11
2718 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@DaneLady:  +1

Post # 16
1022 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@princesslettuce14:  can you invite them to the reception/dance only rather then the ceremony?

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