(Closed) FIL issues-Gifts?

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
636 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Maybe have your Fiance ask his sister if she wants to give out the tanks herself? Then they would be clearly from her and not you.  Other than the sizing issue, I don’t think it would be that big a deal for her to give them out at the rehearsal. I mean, kind of odd considering all the drama with her, but I don’t see how you could ‘refuse’ the gifts without making the situation worse.

Post # 4
365 posts
Helper bee

If she gives them out then she’ll be the one looking heartless giving bigger girls something too small for them.  My main worry wouldn’t be insulting the sister (who sounds horrid anyway) but stopping your besties from getting hurt or humiliated in front of a crowd.  


You should protect them from that, even if you have to slap her in the face.  they are worth it.

Post # 5
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I think you should have your Fiance conveniently forget to tell you about them.

Post # 6
2889 posts
Sugar bee

Have him play dumb and ask what this is that she sent (as if he didn’t already speak to you about it) and see how she responds. I would try to stay out of this unless she particuarly says something baout how she planned this with you. Also, I would rather recieve a shirt that is too small for me than be gifted with something too big. At least it seems someone thought you were smaller than you are instead of overestimating your size, to me that’s a bit more flattering. I once recieved an XL swearer as a gift when I would have bought myself a M and was quite offended!

Post # 7
612 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I would thank her for the thought behind the gifts and tell her that you had already planned gifts for everyone.  I wouldn’t read anything into her buying tanks that are way too small for some of your girls, it could have been an over sight and if it wasn’t then you need to pretend it was.  Leave it at that and don’t let her side comments dampen your mood.

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