Post # 31
Hon, you can do what you want – you’re an adult. Marry whoever you want.
But, please understand this – if you marry an alcoholic (which you are doing), you CANNOT and SHOULD NOT have children with him.
Only marry him if you are willing to be childfree, becase to bring children into this would be the most awful thing to do.
Post # 32
I just read your other post… You’re seriously considering marrying someone who couldn’t resist getting totally wasted drunk when what he was actually supposed to be doing is picking you up from the airport in a city you don’t know and taking you to his parents’ place?? He’s a raging alcoholic. It’s insane to think of marrying him right now.
Post # 33
anonmenon : Reading your previous post and this one, it seems like you’re in denial as to how bad this is. Your Fiance is an alcoholic. He has a major problem. I agree with his parents. I would put the wedding on hold for now. The #1 thing right now is your FI’s health. It is not the time to be planning/worrying about a wedding.
Post # 34
I think your fiance’s parents demonstated how much they love you by having this conversation with you. They clearly care about you a lot.
Post # 35
Its called tough love. And while you may find what they are doing and saying cruel they are coming from a place of love because they don’t want their son to die of alcoholism nor do they want you to ignore how big of a problem it is and continue on like love is enough. Love isn’t enough. Its just not. Not outside of a Disney movie or something you see on the Hallmark station.
I agree with the parents you need to put the wedding off until your Fiance is healthy and sober.
Post # 36
- Wedding: October 2015 - Ruby Princess
so I keep hearing the phrase, “control his drinking” being used. let me make this crystal clear. an alcoholic cannot conrol their drinking. it is that loss of control that is the very nature of alcoholism/ addiction. someone who is not an alcoholic does not really think about ‘controlling’ their drinking. you should listen to your future in laws and reconsider how you want your future to look. an alcoholic/addict will drain you, manipulate you, and then blame you. lather rinse repeat. they know. they’ve been living that hell for many years. i’m not going to tell you what to do. i’m a recovering addict married to another recovering addict. we met in recovery, and are both multi years clean. people do recover, but they have to want to.