(Closed) Finally pregnant, but not happy?

posted 4 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 31
Member
707 posts
Busy bee

I think this needs to be talked about more! I have found I haven’t really enjoyed pregnancy – we didn’t have trouble but expected we would, so being pregnant so soon shocked us a bit. The sickness, the pains, the struggle to bond with Bub is all hard. I think what you’re feeling is normal OP. Just nobody says it!

Post # 32
Member
6808 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Boy #1 12/2015, boy #2 02/2018

scaredmom:  As much as I wanted to get pregnant and have a baby, I am not a big fan of pregnancy. I am doing my best to take care of myself, but I find it very uncomfortable most of the time. It’s always one thing or the other. I don’t hate pregnancy, but I do see it as a road I must travel to get to my final destination, a baby. Being a mother is a lot more exciting to me. I look forward to that. I think this needs to be talked more. I say complain all you want. When I was TTC and nothing was happening, it helped me to put my feelings out there. The same is true for pregnancy. No one knows what it feels like until you go through this. Big hugs to you. You are not alone.

Post # 33
Member
3729 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: City, State

scaredmom:  pregnancy sucks. It’s miserable. I am in a similar boat as you and feel the same way. What my mom friends tell me is that it gets much better once the kid gets here. It’s hard to get excited about being constantly uncomfortable!

Post # 34
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

scaredmom:  Please don’t beat yourself up. I felt this way when we got a dog. It’s not nearly life changing the way a baby is and I had a panic attack about how we’d have to change our life to deal with her. Lol. I feel like with any huge changes, the fear of the unknown is terrifying. But once your baby gets here and you guys figure out a rutine that works for you, things won’t be so scary and you’ll settle into life as a mommy.

Post # 35
Member
1423 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I really hear you on getting close to your due date and feeling sad that it won’t be just you and your husband anymore.  We have been together almost 15 years, and have such a good thing going.  I’m a little worried (terrified, even) that having a baby might throw us off balance, or will really get in the way of being able to have fun (and relaxing) times together.  So these last three weeks pre-baby are really bittersweet right now.  

MechEBee:  I did the same thng when we got a dog! I seriously had an afternoon when I started crying when I realized it wasn’t just us, anymore, and wouldn’t be until we were 40.  But I mostly love having my little furball around.  I’m sure it will be the same with the kiddo.

Post # 36
Member
733 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I think you will do a fantastic job acclimating to a new baby because here you are thinking about it and working through those feelings before the baby arrives. My Darling Husband and I were in denial that it would change things and I think that made it 10 times harder than it should have been. The more you and your Darling Husband talk about things that you will miss and things you are looking forward to, the easier it will all be. 

Post # 37
Member
811 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I definitely feel this way too. Pregnancy is miserable. I’m not in control of my own body, I feel terrible all the time, I’m scared about the huge massive changes that will happen in my life and my marriage with a baby. It’s all very scary and overwhelming. You are definitely not alone! I wish people talked about it more because I generally get a “but preganncy is beautiful and wonderful” response, which sure, I guess it is, but it’s also hard and terrifying and stress inducing and completely disgusting (why does no one talk about the discharge?!) Hang in there lady. I’ve found that the birth group ladies (yay Feb babies!) have been super helpful in validating my own experience and comiserating with. I hope you can find some people to lean on!

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