(Closed) finding roles for all of your BFFs

posted 9 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
2640 posts
Sugar bee

Personally, I wouldn’t be interested in any "roles", if  I was a friend who didn’t make the cut.  I guess doing a reading is nice.  (But for me getting up and reading in front of people isn’t something I’d relish, and therefore, would dred it more than feel honored by it.)  Any other job would seem like work to me.

I would make sure they are included in the bachelorette party.  If you’re having a Bm luncheon, maybe you can invite them to that as more of a relaxed last get together with friends.  If you want to honor them by having an usher give them a flower before the ceremony, OK. 

But I think giving them a role might make them feel like they are being given a consolation prize.  Either the friends are fine with not being in the wedding, and trying to make it up to them isn’t necessary.  Or they are upset.  In which case I wouldn’t think a consolation would help much.

Post # 4
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I had problems in this area.  I don’t think one of the friends will ever forgive me, but she’s kind of a drama queen anyway.  I asked her to read instead because she is oot and working on her phd (which is in a really crazy place right now).  I think it was for the better now, but I thought our friendship was going to be over and I thought I was just being nice.  See what I know.

Post # 5
3331 posts
Sugar bee

I think maybe having your friends participate in the ceremony–maybe doing a reading would be nice.  I was a little hurt when I wasn’t asked to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man for one of my friends and that’s what she offered me.  I was happy that I could participate in the ceremony in some way for her.

Post # 6
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Doing readings and have personal attendants is what I did.

I had my bridesmaids, but spent the most time with my bridal posse made of all the friends I love!

Post # 7
117 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Hey Backhomebride,

I’m an only child with a very small family too and totally share this stress! Just out of curiosity, how many bridesmaids did you end up asking? I’m thinking about asking 11! Wow, I know right?! But I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings either…

Post # 8
1266 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I only have 2 really really close best friends and my cousin (my Maid/Matron of Honor who is like a sister to me) so it wasn’t an issue

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