Post # 1
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
Hi all,
Well, after breaking up with my fiance a few months ago I decided to get back out there and date. I went on a date last night and all was going well then I knocked over my drink and a bit spilt on his phone. The look he gave me was as if I was a f*#*n idiot and he said “nice one” and it was definitely not in a joking tone! I have been so tired lately and people make mistakes! Why are some people so intolerant!! My ex Fiance was slightly emotionally abusive and this is how he would react when I made a mistake (he would be amazing to me most of the time but the minute I made a mistake he would be so rude to me). Am I being overly sensitive? Perhaps I’m still not emotionally ready for dating yet.
Thanks 🙂
Post # 3
Member
1480 posts
Bumble bee
@esplanfreedom: In my experience, your first instincts are right. I would just not date that guy anymore. Obviously it was an accident, no need to get all uppity about it.
Post # 4
Member
1841 posts
Buzzing bee
@esplanfreedom: No, you are totally not being over-sensitive. It was an accident, and he didn’t handle it well. TG this was just a date, because my advice is to RUN away from this particular man and never look back.
Post # 5
Member
406 posts
Helper bee
what an ass…and how awkward. it was clearly a mistake, he didn’t need to get snippy and rude with you. i wouldn’t call him or answer his calls. i feel like a guy on a date is when he is most likely to be the nicest (most of the time) to make a good impression and if he’s not…then how is he gonna act later on?
i’m sorry that things with you and your Fiance didn’t work out. i think you should take your time with dating. dating can suck sometimes!!
Post # 6
Member
7271 posts
Busy Beekeeper
Wow, sorry that happened to you! You are definitely not being over-sensitive. If I were to ever say that to someone it would be a good friend and it would be with a smile on my face. As much as it stinks since it was your first time back out there, at least you found out right away that he is an a-hole!
Post # 7
Hostess
12208 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
@esplanfreedom: wow what a jerk! Glad he outed himself so early. Good for you for getting out the again. I know you’ll meet some good ones, so hang in there.
Post # 8
Member
2250 posts
Buzzing bee
@esplanfreedom: People generally try to make a SERIOUS effort on a first date, so if he’s acting like an ass now, I’d be worried about what’s to come. You are absolutely not being sensitive. Move on, there is someone out there who can’t WAIT to meet you.
Post # 9
Member
4656 posts
Honey bee
Sounds like the last date with that dick. If someone can’t even be compassionate on a first date then they are denied a second.
Post # 10
Member
301 posts
Helper bee
Rude! At least you got to see this side of him on the first date so you don’t have to go on a second date! What a jerk! I’ve spilled stuff before and that is embarassing enough by itself without someone trying to make you feel bad about it!
Post # 11
Member
2934 posts
Sugar bee
People are usually on their best behavior on a first date, so if *that’s* his best behavior…yeah, better off you found out now. He sounds easily annoyed and judgmental.
Post # 12
Member
1459 posts
Bumble bee
No you are not being overly sensitive at all! My gosh, people are usually on their “best” behavior when you first start dating, and this guy is already being overly “critical” and showing his “not so attractive” sides already…… my god can you imagine how much worse he’s going to be if THIS is his best behavior?!
But don’t get too disheartened and bummed out, when you jump back in the dating pool the first several dates are usually duds. Hang in there! Things feel really rough right now, but it WILL DEFINITELY get better as you get back in the groove of things.
Post # 13
Member
685 posts
Busy bee
Lucky it is that you were spared the risk wasting any more time on future dates with this guy! His reaction was a what I would refer to as a HUGE Red Flag. Sorry he made you feel bad but know his reaction was not normal and very indicative of what his true character is.
Upward and onward!! Eventually you’ll find a goodman!! Chalk this one up to a learning experience.
Post # 14
Member
747 posts
Busy bee
@Bebealways: this.
The first date is like the interview. This guy flunked. Um, hello, ever make a mistake? Don’t give this guy a callback.
Post # 15
Member
3256 posts
Sugar bee
@esplanfreedom: No he’s a dick. Maybe it’s a first impression that makes him not want to go out with you again, but, we’ve all been on that date – you make the best of the rest of the date, and you politely decline the next one. So, he thinks you’re an idiot, and you’ve learned he’s a dick. Just move forward. It’s no big deal – just a bad first date. Most first dates are that way.
Post # 16
Member
3692 posts
Sugar bee
That guy’s a jerk and should learn not to put his phone on the table.
My “Mister Right” (DH, obviously) got his $300 electric razor chewed up and ruined by my new puppy when he stayed at my apartment for the first time. He didn’t want to tell me about it because he knew I couldn’t afford to replace it and would have felt terrible. The only reason he said anything is that I asked why he hadn’t shaved.
While Darling Husband was very justifiably upset that his item was ruined, and it wasn’t even really an accident, he never treated me like an idiot or that his stuff was more important than my feelings.
Also, stuff just happens. We knock over drinks at meals. At my wedding dinner, I spilled MIL’s white wine all over the shrimp appetizer we were sharing.
Member