Post # 1
I just came back from a trip home to go to a family wedding, the first one we’ve attended since our wedding in July. It was so nice to see the family again–since we live pretty far away we rarely see the extended family. The first thing people said to me was almost always something nice about our wedding, which was so sweet. But the thing that surprised me was that so often their comments had this comparative tendency. I guess it’s perfectly natural to compare one wedding with the last wedding you attended. But at the same time, I wanted to say, “It’s not a competition!” Both weddings were beautiful in their own ways, of course! I very much appreciated all the compliments for our wedding, but I kind of felt bad getting them because I felt like the focus on that day should be the bride and groom, not the newlyweds from 4 months ago!
And at the same time I did have some slight pangs of jealousy when I saw her gorgeous dress. It was a style similar to ones I loved before dress shopping, but which I quickly figured out wouldn’t work on my short frame. Sigh. I did love my dress though, and it was more season-appropriate and less formal than the other would have been too.
The other highlight of the day was dancing with my husband during the anniversary dance!
Anyone else have anything similar happen at a wedding they’ve attended since their own?
Post # 3
DH’s brother got married in October (we were married in May). I was jealous that they got the fall wedding, since I REALLY wanted a fall wedding, but we didn’t want to rush for fall ’09 or have to wait almost 2 years for fall ’10. We did a smaller daytime wedding at a park, and they opted for a late afternoon to evening wedding with a church ceremony. They had a longer reception and more guests up and dancing, but I really didn’t expect that for our day time wedding. We paid for our wedding ourselves and cut some things that they didn’t. It was nice though, because we are so close with them. There was no competition or tension as we planned together. And Darling Husband was so sweet dancing with me during all the slow songs.
Post # 4
I’d love to see the responses to this!!
Post # 5
At the first wedding we attended in our group of friends after ours, we got a lot of compliments about our own wedding. At the first wedding in our family after ours, we didn’t attend, but my mom told me about it afterward and made a million comparisons to ours. I tihnk it’s just the way people’s brains work – you tend to perceive things in reference to similar past experiences you’ve had. I wouldn’t worry too much about it as long as folks are appropriately enthusiastic and complimentary toward the couple of honor during their wedding.
Post # 6
Im interested in these responses as well! We havent been to a wedding since our own but we have 4 weddings that we are planning to attend next year with the possibility of a couple more! Since the next wedding we are attending will be at the end of May I dont really know if well still be comparing at that point – but I guess well see!
Post # 7
I was 2nd of 4 cousins to get married in a year. One of my cousins was 2 months after my and another 1 month after that. (The first was a first cousin one stepped removed and was several months prior).
Everyone, and I mean everyone, kept telling me ours was the most fun. I mean, even one of the brides on her wedding day!
I agree though, I think mine was the most fun. But that’s because it was at our house, and all my cousins were used to hanging out there.
One of the weddings was definitely way nicer, another was much more beautifully decorated/had way better food, and I didn’t go to one of them.
So I think comparisons are okay, competitions aren’t!
Post # 8
We’ve been to a wedding recently and got complimented on our June wedding. “We had a great time” “your flowers were beautiful” Stuff like that. I think people were just being nice and polite-I didn’t get the sense that the focus was being taken off of the bride and groom. Most wedding guests don’t talk about the bride and groom all night anyway. They want to see the dress, drink, dance, and then catch up with family members too. They probably don’t even mention the couple 10 minutes after the ceremony unless talking to the doting parents or something. Yes, guests are happy and excited, but seriously how long can you talk about Johnny’s unbounded love for Suzie? Or her dress? it could probably fill up an hours worth of conversation.
So, my point to the OP-I think it’s okay that people complimented you and your wedding at another wedding. =)