(Closed) First MIL Vent (Had to happen sometime, right?)

posted 7 years ago in Married Life
Post # 4
Member
1181 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

The cutesy voice is what would get me riled up. I hate being patronized like that. I agree with you. It’s being talked to like a child that is frustrating, especially if you are adults and married with adult concerns and a life that you have to look after, in addition to caring for your family.

Post # 5
Member
354 posts
Helper bee

Tell her she will have to make her own way to the airport, you have delayed getting back as long as you possibly can, and need to get home for your pup.  She made her way from the airport, she can make her way back.

Don’t let her get the best of you, it is obviously a power struggle.  And wtf is up with “She dangles the keys in front of Darling Husband calls him a “good boy” and hands them back” that is beyond rude and condescending, and saying it with a “cute” voice *ugh* people like that are used to getting their way with their fake sugar and spice

Post # 6
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Oh man. I can’t imagine being jet lagged and dealing with this. Can Darling Husband put his foot down about the flight? Can he tell her “look, ma, we’ll drop you off at 3pm b/c we have to drive home.” Or, novel idea, can the Uncle you mentioned drive her? Good luck!! 🙂

Post # 7
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

man your Mother-In-Law bitch factor just went up – once she handed over the keys i would have gotten in the car and driven away

other than that – you are tired and jet lagged and shes being a bitch, try to step back and get some rest, im sorry what should have been an relaxing but exciting homecoming for the two of you is being being ruined by her antics

 

Post # 8
Member
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

oh, man… I think I would’ve threatened her with grand theft auto if she didn’t hand the keys over.  My Fiance…. ummmm… yeah, we won’t go into what he’d do if it was my mom doing that. His mom?  His DAD would come down on her, lol.

I’m soooo sorry you gotta deal with this.  Your hubby needs to tell his mother flat out “no way in hell” and tell her to get her OWN ride to the airport.  🙁  good luck and don’t be afraid to tell your husband how you feel!!!!

Post # 9
Member
1636 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

That is insane.  I really don’t understand why people act they way they do.  There was no reason for her to ambush you before you could even get home.

What’s your hubby’s attitude about this?  When you say everytime you see her this kind of things happens, do you mean she plays this weird, condescending control game with you and your husband?

 

Post # 10
Member
477 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I hope your Darling Husband is standing up for you and setting some boundaries with his family!  This was a HUGE priority for me before we got married – I told Darling Husband I wouldn’t marry him if he didn’t get this priorities straight on this issue!  Its not fair to put you in the middle!

Post # 11
Member
365 posts
Helper bee

Oh, I can’t stand being patronized.  It sounds like she needs a little “come to Jesus” meeting (that is what we say about our horses when they are misbehaving and need some schooling lol).  As in you and your Fiance, as a united front, the next time she does something like this, you tell her like it is.  No need to be mean, but be assertive.  “This is how it is going to be.”  And then drop it and be nice after that.  This can come from your or Fiance, but would probably be best coming from either him or both of you.

Or you could do the immature, but self-satisfying, passive-aggressive, sugary BS right back to her…which is how I deal with FI’s ex when I have to see her (she is still close with some of his family, no kids involved, and I didn’t met Fiance until after they had broken up, FYI).  We look super sweet and like we get along great to FI’s family, but we really can’t stand each other.  I used to just ignore her nastiness, but I got tired of it after two years…this way she knows what I mean without me having to look like a B*.  She isn’t as nasty to me now, knowing that I won’t just take it.

Post # 13
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - Now Jade Riviera, Puerto Morelos Mexico

oh my word. i’m so sorry you have to deal with that! you definitely need to talk to Darling Husband about this and he better have your back!

about dropping her off at the airport… yes, i agree with An Alaskan Bride…tell her that you will drop her off at 3pm, when you were planning on leaving. it’s not like there is nothing to do at the airport. if she doesn’t want to sit at the airport for 3 extra hours, then she needs to find another ride. ugh…man, i’m pissed FOR YOU right now!

good luck!

Post # 14
Member
1701 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Grrrr…

I used to live in Chicago and had a strict rule about rush hour on Friday–NO!  Let Darling Husband tell her you will drop her off at X time.  If she doesn’t like it there are plenty of public transportation options.

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