(Closed) First of Friends Getting Married

posted 7 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 3
Member
6248 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 1900

I am!  I don’t think my experience is anything out of the ordinary for most brides though.  Wedding planning can be stressful and often becomes like a second job, depending on how much research or planning you do.  I don’t really have any gold nuggets of info for you but just wanted to say that I’m in that boat with you.

P.S. CassidyR What have you learned along the way so far?

Post # 4
Member
444 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I’m not the first amongst my friends, but theirs were all a few years ago, when I was nowhere near the wedding headspace. I didn’t know anything about weddings to appreciate all the details, let alone remember it now to inspire me!

Post # 5
Member
5423 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2012

I’m not the first but the first is only several months before mine.  So were all kind of struggling to plan without leaning too much on each other so that we don’t accidentally copy or try to insert our ideas when its not exactly necessary.  Believe me it is tough!

 

All the weddings I’ve been to before was either as a plus 1 or family weddings.

Post # 6
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m in the same boat…first of my close friends and I’ve never been in a wedding before. I’m just calling and talking to everyone I know who recently got marries. My mom is a teacher so she is asking all the younger teachers that either just got married or are engaged and so far I’ve had two binders of information passed onto me! It’s helped A TON especially with their advice on vendors etc and the vendors tend to jump on the opportunity to have a bride that doesn’t know exactly waht she wants so they can be creative!

Good luck!!

Post # 7
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

I was the first, and it was kind of nice, since people hadn’t “been there” before, they didn’t really feel the need to input all of their ideas into our wedding. I think it would have been nice to see some things in action, but a lot of the things that I did, no one had even heard of, so I don’t know how much inspiration I would have had

Post # 8
Member
114 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m in the same boat!  My brother and future SIL (both much older) are not married.  All of our friends are not married (with the exception of my Maid/Matron of Honor, who didn’t really have a wedding, just a quick, small ceremony) so I’m going through all of this with NO IDEA what I’m doing except what I think is supposed to happen based on stories, movies, etc.  In fact, my wedding will be my first official wedding!  

What’s frustrating, is that means I have people “telling me what to do” based on their “experience”– as attendants or guests at other weddings.  My advice, don’t listen!  Take their advice in to consideration because that is what is “traditionally done” and even google some stuff as well, but definitely do what you want to do!  

Other thing I’ve learned: yes, it’s my wedding day, but to some people it’s just a reminder that it’s not theirs.  It’s made me have to be a little bit less excited at certain points, but it’s important to surround yourself with people who have their head on straight because you don’t want to be around someone who feels that this is just a reminder that they don’t have a man and therefore need a drink.  Maybe a guest is understandable, but keep this in mind with those closer to you and maybe schedule a lot of Not Wedding Related talk and events around the WR talk and events.

Post # 9
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I am, too. My friends and I are just going with the flow. 🙂 I turn to the hive when I don’t know or understand something.

Post # 10
Member
1165 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Darling Husband was the first in his core group of friends (including his 5 groomsmen) to get married…and he’s 28! 

Post # 11
Member
2135 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I am the first of my friends too (but since I wil be getting married at 21, its not much of a surprise). I am getting “experience” from watching wedding shows on tv and talking to my mom and stuff.

Post # 12
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I don’t really have that many close close friends anymore but out of the close ones I’ll probably be the first. But out of the ones I could consider friends from high school, quite a few have already married and had children.

It’s kind of weird too since my boyfriend and I have been together since we were sophmores in high school and everyone assumes we’re already married.

Post # 13
Member
2195 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’m the first of my friends, but among the last of FI’s friends. A few of my BMs have never even been to a wedding before! Its been sorta fun figuring it out for ourselves.

Post # 14
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Yup, I am. Its kind of awkward sometimes because none of my girls understand my excitement. And I am always catious of talking about the wedding with them because I don’t want for them to feel bombarded.

Post # 15
Member
781 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m the 2nd of my group of friends, and the girl who did get married just did so a couple weeks ago.  So I’ve definitely been asking her for advice and such.  And it’s nice now that our friends have all done it before, everyone’s like, “Yea don’t worry, we know what to do” LOL.

I actually hope this keeps going and we can keep staying in wedding mode!  One of our other girlfriends just told us her boyfriend hinted at her to start looking at rings…so it’s exciting!

Post # 16
Member
3182 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m definitely not one of the first to get married, actually everyone in our bridal party is married except for one bridesmaid who is divorced, but I did want to pass on a bit of advice.  Please let your bridal party know what to expect ahead of time, I know I look back on my first wedding as a bridesmaid and I pretty much had no idea what I was supposed to do!  It was a bridesmaid fail.  

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