(Closed) FIs aunt is a psycho

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
433 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

hugs to you my dear because holy heck i have no idea what i would do. ugh! so crappy! my FI’s aunt is a psycho as well. crazy people!!!

Post # 4
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

Sorry you are havin gto go through this. Maybe try talking to your Future Mother-In-Law to see what she thinks.

Post # 6
Member
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@Kitty…since it’s something not talked about…I would pretend to know nothing of the drama and invite the cousin anyway…LOL…but that’s just me =)

Post # 7
Member
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

UGH – I hate family drama. Even in seemingly normal families there is often that one person who stirs the pot maybe a little on occasion – but this sounds like she stirs everything up!!!

The last thing you want is for it to cause a fight between you and your Fiance. I would talk to him and have him explain a bit further about what drama could ensue by talking to the cousin. Try not to start a fight or add to the drama but just find out what the big deal is. If there’s a reasonable explanation, then maybe it’s good to stay clear. Like perhaps the cousin has issues as bad as the aunt and he’s trying to protect you from that? Families are hard to understand.

If there’s no real reason, I would still talk to whomever you want and be polite etc but I would keep in my mind what he’s saying because he knows how the drama unfolds in his family. If you want to invite the cousin, do it, but I would forewarn Future Mother-In-Law and Fiance. I think you can explain it as – I want to extend the invite to everyone and make sure that it is inclusive of all family members. Just make sure you are including everyone else if this is what you’re telling them.

 

Good luck!!!!!!

Post # 9
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

Weird. I see two reasonable options: invite her anyway because you like her, she’s family, and their politics sound ridiculous and shouldn’t interfere with your normal life; OR talk to your Future Mother-In-Law to figure out what the fall-out could *possibly* be for her (more cattiness? sounds like she knows how to deal with that. potential disinheritance? maybe don’t put her in that situation). If they’re all just being silly, do your own thing. But make sure that’s what it is first.

Post # 10
Member
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@Kitty…me either…we are a pretty blunt family as well. A feud that spans years without being confronted is unheard of in my family. I mean…we have siblings or what have you that we don’t particularly like or agree with but they KNOW it…and everybody else knows it…and whatever story happens to be behind it =) It wouldn’t sit well with me to have somebody dictate who I could talk to without there being a LOGICAL explanation other that “so and so might get mad and retaliate”.

Post # 11
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

That is sad. Would it be possible to slowly start to change things? I am sorry. I am at a loss. I probably wouldn’t want to marry into that family. From what you have stated, things seem like they would only get worse with time, unless someone steps in to start a change.

Post # 13
Member
272 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Ugghhh sounds like more than FI’s aunt is crazy. Best of luck to you, family drama is always so frustrating.

Post # 14
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

That’s not cool, so now everytime that you are with some of FI’s family you have to follow the rules. EEk but as the saying goes “Marry him, you marry the family.” I say just try to avoid the drama, if it’s something as small as not inviting the cousin then I would just do that, but that may bring some drama of its own. Tough situation!

Post # 15
Member
624 posts
Busy bee

>>that the aunt will get mad at Future Mother-In-Law if her daughter sees me having too much fun with my friends because we are all normal and don’t still live at home and the aunt will be pissed that her daughter will be “exposed” to people the same age as her who, like, have lives.<<

So you’re supposed to sit there with your legs properly crossed living the life the aunt wants???  I say let her be mad at you if it means living your life!  What more can be ruined?

Post # 16
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Wow I just read your last post! So mommy dearest! That poor girl! She’s like a caged bird, the aunt is crazy!

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