- 6 years ago
Hey everyone. I am a regular bee, and had to go incognito for a minute because Fiance knows my actual account and it’d probably make him a little unhappy if he saw what I was about to post.
His brother is making me want to rip my hair out. We are currently in the process of buying a home together and remodeling it. FI’s brother just came back from overseas (college) and is staying in the home with Fiance until he gets a job. If he gets a job any time soon. If he chooses to get a job. Basically, he’s living with us rent-free (and he doesn’t buy groceries or pay for…anything, really) until he gets a job. The problem with that is…his loans begin coming in as soon as he is employed. Which means, he can’t just work at McD to make a little extra money because his loans would be too large to pay off working there. So, he wants to get a good job that pays well. I get that. I do.
Fiance and I have had a ‘system’ for a while now. When we get off work, we come home, spend time with the puppies, and then settle in and eat dinner and either read or choose a movie via Netflix to enjoy or rip apart together. That’s our thing. It has been our thing for months and months. Now when I get home, since FI’s brother is there all day, he’s already on Netflix watching Breaking Bad (I’m about to breaking bad the TV screen). He doesn’t move until around 10 PM, and then he leaves to see his friends for a few hours and then comes back and gets back on the TV.
See, he was supposed to have a job lined up in September doing field work and was going to take it. Somehow there was a miscommunication and the boss actually meant he had to be there in ONE day with all his supplies (they have to purchase their own equipment). That one day was today. And surprise, he can’t make it there by then..so now he has no job lined up..which means he’ll be staying with us indefinitely.
I wouldn’t be so irritated…if his brother even carried on polite conversation with me. But he avoids me like I have the plague. It’s enough to make me want to scream. And then, when I do coerce him into talking, it’s one or two word mumbles and then a hasty exit to his ‘bedroom’ (which should be the office where I do school work, but it can’t be, because he’s here.) UGH.
I just really needed to vent, mostly. I am sorry for taking up minutes of your time. If you have any advice on how to handle this (or cope with it, at least) please let me know. I don’t want to sound selfish, but, damnit, Fiance and I will be married soon and I don’t want our ‘honeymoon year’ to include his brother in the house. We’re also going to be remodeling, so that’s another body that will just be in the way to get stuff done. ARGGGGGGH!!!!
Mods, if this needs to be in The Lounge or elsewhere, you can move it. I didn’t know where to put it! 🙂
Edited for a little more info: Fiance is a very giving person. He does things for people beyond what he should. He’s constantly catering to his family’s needs…and he already has the beginning stages of arthritis due to his job. He doesn’t need to be working at 9 PM on sawing boards and moving stuff to make his brother’s bed. His brother has two hands. Fiance has already opened his home. His brother can help. :/