- 8 years ago
Hi, I am a frequent poster here but have created an anonymous username because I really need to vent. I don’t guess I’m looking for answers because there are none, I just need to get some things off my chest.
Future Mother-In-Law has always been distant and cold. She was this way with Fiance his entire life, and especially cold to me.
6 months ago, FI’s brother passed away. Future Mother-In-Law became even more distant, while Future Father-In-Law mourned openly. Everyone mourns in their own way, which is fine, but Future Mother-In-Law began to demean Future Father-In-Law for “boo hoo-ing all the time.” She continued to get more and more harsh to the point that Future Father-In-Law felt guilty for needing to grieve the loss of his son. Future Father-In-Law began to suffer mentally and has been dealing with severe depression. FMIL has no sympathy and says he just wants people to feel sorry for him. She has not tried to be there for Future Father-In-Law emotionally, she has just chastised him for still grieving.
Less than 2 months after FI’s brother passed away, Future Mother-In-Law moved a 20 year old boy into their home. I will call him B. The boy lived near, had broken up with his girlfriend who he lived with, and needed a room. Future Mother-In-Law seemed to become obsessed with B. She gave him money, helped him get his driver’s license, gave him a car, and got him into a G.E.D. program. This sounds great and helpful for B, but we all suspected it was her trying to deal with the loss of her son by throwing herself into something else. So we said nothing. Then Future Mother-In-Law began going on trips to the beach with B, went to get a tattoo with B, making Future Father-In-Law leave the room so she and B could watch a movie together…the list goes on. This was when Fiance and I began to think that their relationship was inappropriate. Future Father-In-Law has found used condoms and “love letters” from Future Mother-In-Law to B, so that pretty much confirms it.
Future Father-In-Law has been getting worse. He is still depressed over his son’s death, and for the last 4 months he has had to live in a house with his wife and her 20 year old fling. She has fed Fiance, her parents, and anyone who would listen, stories of how Future Father-In-Law is so controlling of her and jealous of B. She says that she has lost weight and is “hot and sexy” now, and her husband can’t stand it, he is so jealous.
Last night, Future Father-In-Law found B’s pot stash. When he confronted B, Future Mother-In-Law blew up and called Future Father-In-Law a liar. She left with B and went to a hotel room, and texted Fiance in the most dramatic way possible saying “We had to flee the house, don’t worry, we’re okay.” Future Mother-In-Law told Fiance that she opened a separate bank account and has been secretly putting money in it so she can leave. It is obvious that she is going to leave with B.
Fiance finally decided to call his grandparents (FMIL’s parents) today because he thinks that they are his mother’s last hope. It was useless. They told him that he was lying about his mom’s affair and that if he thought he could call them and get them on his dad’s side he was dead wrong. They say that Future Mother-In-Law is finally doing something for herself and Fiance needs to be happy for her if he calls himself a son. They live 2000 miles away so I guess that they can say whatever they want, but Fiance is here and he sees what is going on.
The whole situation is so ridiculous. Fiance is genuinely worried for his mother, but no one seems to care.
I feel helpless, all I can do is sit back and be furious at Future Mother-In-Law for caring so little about her family that she would just throw it away for this boy that she just met. I feel awful for Future Father-In-Law who continues to spiral downward, and worse for Fiance who feels like he needs to fix everything but doesn’t know how.