(Closed) FI’s little sister as Bridesmaid?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
293 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Why are you paying her tuition, cell and car/insurance??

No, you aren’t being unreasonable.  If you don’t want her in it, don’t have her. Period.

Post # 4
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Um no, that would bother me too.  She feels entitled and I can’t stand that type of attitude.  That being said, she is your FI’s sister.  I’d first ask him how he feels about it.  If he feels more comfortable having her be a Bridesmaid or Best Man, I’d invite her (hating it the whole time obviously) and I’d tell her you’re NOT paying for her dress.  That’s not something you should HAVE to do.  Maybe you’ll get your way and she won’t want to be one if you’re not paying her way?  And I think that’s horrible that she’s planning on not attending her brothers wedding, yikes.

Post # 5
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

Dont worry. Its your wedding and you cant make EVERYONE happy. Maybe your Fiance can help with talking to his sis about it & why she wasnt chosen .. money wise or she just doesnt know you.

Post # 6
7152 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Why are you paying all of this for her anyway? You are not obligated to have her in the wedding. How does your Fiance feel about it? Maybe you should share wyour concerns with him and see what he says. She sounds like she’s being a brat!

Post # 7
354 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. You’re not unreasonable at all for letting it bother you. Are she and your Fiance close? Would it help if he talked to her about it? Try to stand your ground, explain to her why she hasn’t been asked to be a bridesmaid, and don’t let her bully you. IMO, your justification is very reasonable. While I’m sure it will be very disappointing to you and your Fiance if she doesn’t attend your wedding, she is an adult, it’s her decision whether she chooses to attend, and ultimately, it will be her loss if she doesn’t. Good luck and big hugs!

Post # 9
169 posts
Blushing bee

Wait you help her pay her tuition etc? Then you two sound pretty close… where are her parents??? Also, I think you should put her in the wedding party… but she should pay for all the expenses herself like every other bridesmaid… just explain that to her

Post # 10
1154 posts
Bumble bee

Well, regarding the coming to the wedding part – if I had a close friend who asked me to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man and the wedding was the same day as a brother I wasn’t close to who was marrying a woman I didn’t like – I would definitely want to attend my friend’s wedding.  I’d feel pressure to do the “right”/taditional thing and put family first but if I wasn’t asked to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man I might feel that meant hey, they aren’t doing the “tradition”/”right” putting family first thing so why should I? Can’t I go to my friend’s wedding? It could be a tipping/last straw thing.

Aside from that minor point about attending the wedding and her possible reasoning I vote don’t ask her.

You are not obligated to have her in your party and I would not ask her.  It’s asking for trouble and IMO the point of a bridal party is having those close to you around and supporting you, you deserve that.

Post # 11
99 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

um shes insane. just tell her no.

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