(Closed) FI’s Mentor Bringing Mistress to Wedding?!?!

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

ummm his mentor has a mistress?? That doesn’t sound good, what kind of mentor is that anyways??? If she’s not on your invite list, you don’t have to let her in. Any why are you and your Fiance worried about offending him, you should be more concerned about offendingthe mentor’s family. That’s total bullshit!

Post # 4
Member
7777 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Just tell them that, unfortunately, you already turned in the final guest count numbers to the venue and they will not allow you to add on anyone else.

Post # 5
Member
46590 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Ditto with @zippylef: You are lucky that he already replied that he was coming alone. It gives you the out you need.

 

Post # 6
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

ummm his mentor has a mistress?? That doesn’t sound good, what kind of mentor is that anyways???

really? people have their own lives and make their own choices and mistakes and that doesnt mean they cant be good career/education mentors – doesnt mean they are guiding me spiritually or their love life choices affect my homelife/career. being a mentor does not mean you have to live a lilly white life

Post # 7
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@eloping: is tealeaf132 your alter ego???  you seemed to take a comment that wasn’t even directed at you, very personally. IMO someone who is making such a poor decision as bringing their mistress to a wedding along with their family, with little regard to the bride and groom and whoever else may be involved, doesn’t sound like a great mentor. And I stand by my previous statement, “that doesn’t sound good.”

Post # 8
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

@Bostonsmom: sorry Bridesmaid or Best Man, no alter online egos for me but i guess i can seperate work from private, i have seen great mentor suffer in their personal lives and sometimes through not fault of their own but yet they continue to be good people, we dont know the facts about this man to judge him so quickly. 🙂

sorry OP, didnt mean to hijack

Post # 11
Member
827 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I’m hoping that your Fiance is helping deal with this.  Perhaps he would know how best to respond?  I mean if you want, you could always just say that they require a two weeks notice for respondents, and it’s just not negotiable. 

Post # 12
Member
2313 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@eloping: 

I see what you’re saying, but it’s also kind of, for lack of a better word, TACKY to bring a known mistress to a WEDDING. I mean, of all places! Picnic, whatever, I’ll keep my mouth shut. But a wedding? 

Post # 13
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

@tealeaf132: Have him reply with a, “I’m really sorry that you bought the plane ticket without checking with us first. Usually, airlines will let you change the flight for  small fee. Unfortunately, we’re unable to accommodate some of our own family at the wedding, and would appreciate you respecting our wishes.”

Sorry dude…you RSVP’d for 1 and you’re past the RSVP deadline.

Post # 15
Member
743 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

You respond saying “Guess what, we just called the venue, and they are graciously allowing us to add one more person.”  Just let her come, don’t make a big deal out of it.  There will be tonnes of other people at your wedding and you probably will only see this “friend” for 30 sec.  You were already prepared to pay for mentor plus 2-3 other people (wife and kids), right, so, even though you don’t approve of his friend, I’d kinda look at it as money already spent.

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