(Closed) FI’s Mom and Brother can’t come to the wedding…

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I am so sorry! ๐Ÿ™  I know it’s not the same, but can you get a live feed they can watch or are you having a videographer?

Post # 4
165 posts
Blushing bee

Oh, honey, I am so sorry. I am a recent MOB (wedding 2-26-11) and my daughter had the exact same issue. Her husband’s family is from Colombia South America and his mom did not get her visa to attend the wedding. Because of finances, his dad and 2 sisters did not apply. We found out about 1 month before the wedding. They went to apply back in October and were turned away because the line was too long.

The visa system is HORRIBLE. It needs to be changed. We ended up skyping the ceremony and parts of the reception from our iPhone and it worked out well. His mom and sisters got to see the actual ceremony on the ir computer. We just had someone hold their phone on the events happening. it was easier than hooking up a computer. We didn’t need to worry about internet access- we just used the 3G network.

I was so upset over this and I was crying the day of the wedding because no mother should miss her son getting married. I feel your sadness and can relate. I wish I could help.

Post # 6
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@jushackett- What type of visa did they apply for and what was the reason for denial? (I work in Immigration, so curious)

Post # 7
575 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I’m so sorry!!  We were so stressed about this for my Father-In-Law when they applied for visa’s from South Africa.  They were lucky, and I’m also curious about why they were denied…are you sure there isn’t time to re-apply?  My Father-In-Law got their passport/visa’s back in a week!!

Post # 8
165 posts
Blushing bee

When my daughter’s Mother-In-Law applied for her visa, it was denied and she was told she could reapply in 3 months. No sooner.

I was so upset about this situation I called our state representative’s office. He said that if anyone applies for a visa and says they have family in the US it is almost automatically denied. The US does not want people coming into this country and never leaving. I pointed out that that is how all our ancestors got here. Apparently the attitude of the US has changed since then.

I mentioned that my daughter’s Mother-In-Law was leaving behind her 2 daughters and that pretty much guaranteed she would return home to Colombia. The representative said that it doesn’t guarnantee anything. Apparently people leave their children behind all the time. I was shocked!

Furthermore, the man I spoke to said my daughter’s Mother-In-Law would have had better luck getting a visa if she said she wanted to come to DisneyWorld! The US wants people to spend their money and then go home. Can you believe he actually said that???

He also said that the decision on a visa is made quickly. There is no rhyme or reason. The person is in a bad mood? No visa for you! If you look on the US consulate web site- it says visas are denied if you are convicted of a crime, on drugs, etc etc. But we all know this is not true. My daughter’s Mother-In-Law is a working, single mother raising 2 teenagers. She just wanted to come to the US to see her son get married. Some hardhearted person decided that wasn’t going to happen.

Post # 9
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@djoann958: That’s disgusting. America really has an immigration phobia nowadays.

Post # 11
165 posts
Blushing bee

My daughter’s Mother-In-Law lives 8 hours away from Bogota where she had to apply for her visa. She went in Oct (with her 2 daughters and ex husband), traveled 8 hrs by bus, paid for a hotel room and the next day were turned away because they line was too long (even though that was the day they were told to show up). They were told they would receive a letter in 4-6 weeks to come back to try again. They didn’t receive the letter until Jan. Late Jan she went alone (again traveling 8 hours…. remember- her son is in the US waiting to find out since Oct if his mom can come to his wedding) and was quickly denied.

All that time and money wasted. Plus, when you pay the application fee (hundreds of dollars) and are denied- you do not get your money back. That is criminal.

My son-in-law’s best friend and his parents also applied for their visas. His friend was to be a groomsman. His parents were given their visas, his friend was denied. What??? 2 of 3 people in a family given the visa, the other not given one. And the 3 applied on the same day at the same time.

So, my son-in-law, was not able to have his parents or his best friend present at his wedding.

Sorry I keep posting about this, but the man I spoke to in my state representative’s office said nothing will change unless the American people want it changed. He said I should keep telling my story to anyone who will listen.


Post # 12
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

oh this is terrible…. 

i feel so bad for you two to be going tru this.

So bad they didn’t apply sooner .. .but that’s not how to fix this now …. 

Can you guys SKYPE to them or some thing? 

oh i’m so sorry




Post # 13
749 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m sorry this happened ๐Ÿ™ getting US visas seems to be next to impossible if you’re from a lot of African countries. I lived in Tanzania for a while and all of my friends said that they tried to get visas to go to US universities, but were denied because of funding or no reason at all. It seems that even if you have a sponsor, its unlikely. It sucks about your Mother-In-Law and Brother-In-Law ๐Ÿ™

Post # 14
660 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

It is very hard to obtain a visitor visa to the United States because you have to show that you are not intending to remain in the U.S. illegally once your visa expires.  So you have to show the consulate/embassy ample evidence of your resources that demonstrate that you are returning to your home country, such as buinesses, home, land, etc…

The fact that your relative is a U.S. citizen doesn’t matter, they only look at the person who is requesting the visa.

However, your Fiance can petition his mother and his siblings to come to the U.S., to live that is, not to visit.

It sucks and I’m sorry you guys are going through this.


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