(Closed) FI's now single ex has a photo of them as their Facebook profile picture…

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 32
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

@Baal:  I would def report this and make FB admin remove the pic or take the necessary action to get it removed. I wouldn’t care less on another hand, because your Fiance seems very loyal to you, but that guy def crossed a line – i don’t think he really gets the fact that he looks funny posting a pic like that. 

Also, some posters has spread some negativity about your relationship to your Fiance because of his sexuality. I find their opinions ridiculous. My brother is gay and he knew it from the start. Not straight,not BI.. just gay. I don’t know how it works for others, but that was his experience ๐Ÿ™‚ I find it refreshing to see people here being open and honest about their sexuality and be proud of it! Yay! 

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@nycsa:  I was thinking of that same thing too!

On a side note, I deleted my FB account, not because of the drama, because it’s such an overrated thing. I didn’t find it fun anymore.  And that was the best thing I did because I don’t even miss it! ๐Ÿ˜€ 

Post # 33
11736 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Would definitely bother me, but I don’t think you can really even ask him to remove it (well you can but he seems like the type that would do it even more just to annoy you!)- it’s odd but technically within his right to put whatever picture up he would like. Try and just let it go. Maybe you guys could de-friend or block him so you don’t have to see it?

Oh and +1 to ignoring the ignorant comments about bisexuality on here. I missed the part where you were asking for advice on that part of your relationship! ๐Ÿ˜‰ People love to give their unsolicited opinions!  

Post # 34
1856 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

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@Baal:  So glad you said this. This crap infuriates me.

On the original subject, meh. I probably wouldn’t be that upset about it because it’s just FB – clearly people who know your Fiance know he’s with you. I’m not really bothered by how things like that might appear to other people, but I can understand why it would bother you, so it’s not irrational or silly. It sounds like he might be the type of person to do that to get attention or to provoke your Fiance (or you), and is best ignored.

Post # 35
750 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

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@jothecatlady:  It’s hard not to find generalisations and stereotypes offensive, even if they weren’t meant to be. I agree with OP, and I feel as though nothing needed to be said about people’s views on bisexuality, that wasn’t what the question was, the question was, “would it bother you if your SO’s ex put a pic of them as their profile picture on FB?” and that’s all anyone really needed to comment on. HOWEVER, now that the inner workings of bisexuals HAVE been commented on, I’ll admit that I identify as bisexual. I don’t and have never cheated on Danny. I don’t think about cheating on Danny. I don’t miss women. Danny is ALLLLL I need and want. 

And yeah, OP, it would irritate the hell out of me if someone did that on FB. And my SO not doing anything about it would bug me even more. I don’t blame you! 

Post # 36
1732 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

This would bug the hell out of me, but I also think you’re best not letting this guy know that it bothers you. Just try to forget about it, and if anyone brings it up to you, you can say something along the lines of “Oh, yeah, I saw that…Fiance and I don’t know what’s going on with him. Hope he’s OK”…making it very clear that 1) you’re not threatened, but that 2) you find it very strange. Puzzled serenity is always the best response to people trying to bruise your cool. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 37
3682 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Is your fiance still friends with the guy?  By putting that picture up, he’s just showing everybody that he’s pathetic.

Post # 39
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Puzzled serenity – totally!  The guy is clearly looking for attention from your Fiance.  He shouldn’t give it to him.

Post # 40
2393 posts
Buzzing bee

Gosh, this must be a new trend. I know someone casually and she got divorced earlier this year. Her ex-husband is now having a raging, hot and heavy affair with a new woman and they are already talking about marriage. When she found out that her ex DH had moved on, she changed her profile pic to an old pic of them in happier times  — him with his arms around her giving her a kiss. I guess she is trying to get a rise out of the new woman in his life, but it isn’t working.

OP, there isn’t much you can do about it except take comfort in the fact that this makes your SO’s ex look pathetic.

Post # 41
122 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I find it interesting that there are comments about OP having a relationship with a bisexual man, as opposed to addressing the issue presented in the post (an ex who won’t let up).

OP, it’d bother me too. However, I’d just let it go, as hard as it is – the problem lies with this asshole, not with you and your man.

Post # 42
9050 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

It would annoy me too. My most significant ex has a photo with me cropped out of it (you can see my hand on his shoulder) as his profile pic and it’s just like “really… In 7 years you haven’t taken a better pic you could post?” but I would just chalk it up to “exes are crazy” and let it go. I wouldn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing it bugs me. 

Post # 43
758 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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@Bellagiobride:  *facepalm* Other have already commented on this, but seriously.

The heterosexual team…really?

Post # 44
1297 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Sekhmet I had this happen too! Not long after now-DH and I started dating, his ex gf (they dated maybe a month?) made her profile picture one of him and her. It annoyed the CRAP out of me. I never said anything about it, because really, it just made her look pathetic. I suggest you do the same. I don’t think FB will take pictures down for this kind of complaint.

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