Post # 1
Member
358 posts
Helper bee
I am half ranting half asking for advice here…
My Future Mother-In-Law refuses to wear a corsage. She hates hates HATES them. So when my FI’s sister got married, my Mother-In-Law carried a tiny bouquet as she and Father-In-Law walked FI’s sister down the aisle.
I guess it’s okay for my Mother-In-Law to put her foot down on this one little thing (Oh and no mums allowed because those are only used in funerals in Italy so she hates them), but the thing is, I think the tiny bouquet looked so stupid! I hate it so much.
I think corsages are beautiful and wish she would wear one. I think the issue is that she doesn’t like to do things that make her look old (and she’s in her 60’s so it’s kind of time to own it). She also wore a formal gown to SIL’s wedding without a jacket or anything to cover her arms, and she has flappy old-lady arms. So the likelihood is, if I don’t say anything she will be flapping her way down the aisle with her little tiny bouquet, looking absolutely ridiculous at my wedding.
I am not touching the dress choice; just beceause it’s my wedding doesn’t mean everyone has to start dressing according to my taste. But what can I do about this bouquet issue? Can I just put my foot down on the bouquet the way she put her foot down on the corsage? Or should I just deal with it? Technically I won’t be there to see her walk down the aisle anyway.
Post # 3
Member
3943 posts
Honey bee
This is not a battle worth having in my opinion.
Post # 4
Member
1475 posts
Bumble bee
If it is really going to bother you, I say you put your foot down. This is your wedding, not hers. You don’t have to tell her that her tiny bouquet looks ridiculous, but you could say you want her to wear a corsage to “match” what the other honored women are wearing.
Post # 5
Member
6825 posts
Busy Beekeeper
Just deal with it. So not worth the battle
Post # 6
Member
3691 posts
Sugar bee
She’ll look like a fool, not you. Let her have her stupid little bouquet and flappy arms.
Post # 7
Member
2023 posts
Buzzing bee
Why dont you get her a pretty bracelet instead? Etsy.com has some great ones!
Post # 8
Member
306 posts
Helper bee
my mum sis and mum in law didnt want to wear one or carry bouquet the mums are wearin soft floaty dresses and i didnt want them to make holes in it or faff with magnets. some are attatching a corsage to there cluth bags and others are having wrist corsage.x
Post # 9
Member
223 posts
Helper bee
It’s not worth it. Just get her a small bouquet.You are right– you will not see it and in the end it doesn’t matter at all. My Future Mother-In-Law and mom will be holding small bouquets as well, but because we all hate corsages also and settled on the bouquet. Not worth getting frustrated over!
Post # 10
Member
9074 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
Choose your battles.
At the end of the day is what she carried going to matter? You’ll be married and the family will be happy and not angry at one another.
Post # 11
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
@Junip3r: I had a simlar issue with family. If I got one person a corsage then I needed to get EVERYONE a corsage. 14+ corsage’s later- NO ONE IS GETTING ONE.
And they can bitch- if it bother’s them enough they can pay the $250 for everyone to have one. Or they can sit the hell down.
Sorry you have to deal with this. If I wasn’t at the end of my goddamn rope with the “it’s a family event and I sould have a say even though I’m not paying” additude, I would have SO let it go too.
Post # 13
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee
@Junip3r: can she wear a flower brooch instead?
Post # 14
Member
5761 posts
Bee Keeper
OP…I wouldn’t want a corsage either, OR a wristlet or a small bouquet. I think there are more important things to spend money on that day. I also think if you’re asking her what she’d like, you have to honor her request.
Post # 15
Member
358 posts
Helper bee
@ItWasntMe: I couldn’t agree with you more on the not having bouquets. I actually wanted to forgo them altogether, or at least not carry one myself, but that’s another thing my Mother-In-Law made a non-negotiable before we had a chance to discuss it. And yeah, I haven’t asked her what she wanted, she told me outright when I brought up not wanting bouquets.
@Hyperventilate: Everyone except for me, you mean.
Post # 16
Member
358 posts
Helper bee
@Sea_Ashley: That would probably work, if there were other women. We are having somewhat of a destination wedding, so our grandmothers aren’t coming. And my mother isn’t invited. So it’s just her and her baby bouquet.
I do realize it’s not a big deal. It’s just another one of those things, you know? Everybody has their “I wants” and don’t think about what we want. My SIL just texted me asking about group room booking, even though invites or even stds haven’t been sent out. She wants to make sure she and my brother get “a specific room” for their “special holiday”. It didn’t occur to her that there are limited specialty suites, and maybe we would like them.
