(Closed) FMIL Drama

posted 10 years ago in Family
Post # 3
1664 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I can see both sides.  Personally, I wouldn’t do or say anything.  Your families don’t have to love each other.  I know it is easier said than done, but try not to be upset, it could be worse. 🙂

Post # 4
569 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I don’t know that there’s anything you can do, other than give it time and hope that your Future Mother-In-Law just lets it go. It was obviously a misunderstanding, but if your Fiance already explained that to his mother, then I don’t think you need to get involved. She’s going to think what she wants, no matter what you tell her. If she gets drunk and mentions it again, then you should probably try to clear up the confusion, but I wouldn’t bring it up if I were you.

Post # 5
9024 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If you really want to ease the tension, then I wouldnt report back to your parents whatever Future Mother-In-Law says about them and would just try and ignore any comments about the past.  The longer that you and your Fiance are together everyone will realize that you guys are serious about each other and the tensions will gradually fade away

Post # 6
1166 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I agree that time is the best cure for this situation. Also, don’t hold it against your Future Mother-In-Law… I can totally see how your dad’s comment would have upset her. Regardless of your FH’s issues in the past, he is her son, and the past is the past, and you are both happy now, so it would seem to be an unnecessary and somewhat insensitive comment at this point.

Please don’t get me wrong – I also understand your dad’s point of view, and how it might not have seemed like a big deal from his perspective. But it’s not surprising that she would be upset by it.

There’s nothing more you can do, except to encourage positive interaction between your parents and his. The more positive experiences they have together, the sooner your Future Mother-In-Law will see that it wasn’t intended to be an insult.

Post # 7
714 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Honestly?  I think regardless of your Dad’s sense of humor, he really put his foot in his mouth.  Of course your FI’s Mom would be offended and feel protective!  Unless she brings it up again, I think you should just let it go.  If she does bring it up again, apologize for your Dad and tell her that while yes, they were concerned about you when there were problems, they have come to love and respect your Fiance and she need not worry about them disliking him any more.

Post # 8
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

i think you should stop involving your parents in your relationship.  now that you guys are engaged, you really should tell them about every problem you have with Fiance or FIs family.  recipe for disaster.  there’s really nothing for you to do.  this will blow over.  and if not, so what?  the families dont have to be best friends.  as long as they are cordial to each other, there shouldnt be a problem.

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