(Closed) FMIL E-Ring Drama

posted 8 years ago in Rings
Post # 32
Member
1826 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

@ladychatterley:  I understand this one. My family can be extremely passive aggressive at times and it’s hard to not completely freak out on them at times.

So instead I fight fire with fire…stay pleasant and state something like it doesn’t bother me at all but definitely gets my point across.

For your situation I would probably just turn and and smile at her and agree. “Yes, you’re sooooo right! Gemstone erings are soooo cheap and tacky. I wonder what PRINCESS KATE thinks of her cheap tacky sapphire ering?!”…and just walk away while they sputter! ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 33
Member
662 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

What a bummer! Honestly, it seems that Future Mother-In-Law is panicking about “losing a son” and not focused on “gaining a daughter”. It wouldn’t matter if you were getting a diamond–she’d find something ELSE to bully you about. Sounds like there will be some bumps on the wedding planning road, but if you can bear it with a modicum of grace at least you’ll always feel good about YOUR behavior :).

Post # 34
Member
1258 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

wow…that’s really sad! First off, the ring choice is between you and your fiance…not her. Really…it’s none of her business what you pick as it’s YOUR ring. Let her have her “opinion” but ignore it.

Some people never get an e-ring or wedding ring, but are still married…does that mean they aren’t really “married?” of course not! It almost sounds as if your Future Mother-In-Law has other issues and it’s being taken out on the ring…just my thoughts.

Get what you love and forget about her issues..yikes. Good Luck!

Post # 35
Member
6710 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

@ladychatterley:  That is so lame. Who in their right mind says you aren’t really getting married because you chose a different stone (or even no ring t all)????? She sounds pretty flipping immature.

Post # 36
Member
1540 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

That’s so rude. I hope she’s ok to deal with during the wedding planning. God forbid you do anything she doesn’t like.

Good luck!

Post # 40
Member
1149 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Ignore it and do what you want. If she keeps bugging you about it, point out Kate Middleton’s amazing sapphire ering!

That said, I do agree with @dewingedpixie, amethyst might not be durable enough long term for an engagement ring. I have an amethyst RHR that is a bit scratched and I don’t even wear it every day. Could you do a purple sapphire instead?

Post # 41
Member
2278 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Rock your ring with pride ♥ I’m sorry she’s being so rudely opinionated ๐Ÿ™ 

Post # 42
Member
4474 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

The ring’s between you and your Fiance – it’s none of your FMIL’s business what you pick.  The best thing to do with tantrums like this is to keep calm, stand your ground, and to ignore them.  When people’s drama isn’t indulged, they usually fizzle themselves out and give up on trying to rile you up.

Post # 43
Member
3336 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

@ladychatterley:  Aww, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with a Future Mother-In-Law like that.  She sounds like a close-minded traditionalist.  You’re right that she probably will never like your ring.  But hopefully you’re wrong that she’ll always voice that opinion to you.  If your Fiance asks her to stop because she’s hurting your feelings, maybe she will.  That won’t change her opinion, but at least that will get her to stop bullying you about your dream ring.

Post # 45
Member
2529 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Well, when your Fiance proposes to his MOM, then she can design her dream ring.
Oh wait… she’s not marrying him? She’s already married? She has her own ring?

Then it’s none of her business and you should tell her so if she keeps it up.
Future Mother-In-Law, we love you but this is our engagment and we will do it how we see fit.

But here’s the trick: lesson learned, Future Mother-In-Law does not get to hear any more details about your wedding or anything pending or intimate about your lives.
She’s already proven herself to be a royal pain in the arse with your choices, and trust me… it’s only going to get worse with the wedding.

Good luck, OP!

Post # 46
Member
2851 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

View original reply
@ladychatterley:  purple is my favorite as well–I’m a little bit obsessed! I’m jealous that amethyst is your birthstone! I wear two amethyst RHRs and have some other amethyst jewelrey, so people think it’s my birthstone. But nope, I’m a December baby! One of the reasons my purple sapphire e-ring went over so well is that anyone who knows me knows how much I love purple!

Can’t wait to see pics of your ring once it’s done!!

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