(Closed) FMIL Help

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
571 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Well, I had sort of the opposite experience with my in-laws, in that they were very un-involved and I worried that I was bothering them with wedding details, but I found it useful to send update E-mails to them to let them know how things were progressing. You might find it helpful to set up a schedule for sending updates… maybe every other week or something.  I would include links to the centerpieces I was considering, a link to our venue’s website, pictures of the Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses, etc.  Maybe that will help her feel involved, but also give her a realistic idea of where you are in the planning.

As far as projects, I would offer to put her in charge of/ ask her if she would like to research some aspect of the wedding that needs to happen, but you don’t care that much about.  Like maybe transportation or the hotel block for the wedding.  She can do research and save you time, but it is something that doesn’t affect the look/style of the wedding much at all.

Post # 4
1801 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m sure she just wants to feel involved and is excited about getting a new daughter.  Her e-mails are probably her way of being part of the wedding planning since she’s so far away.  Maybe ask her what she’d like to wear and get her opinions on some things and she’ll feel like she’s appreciated and included.  It’s tough to suggest an actual project with the distance though.

Post # 5
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Maybe you could ask her to plan the rehearsal dinner? It’s fairly traditional for the groom’s family to host anyways and then she could feel involved with her own project, without intruding on the projects you are working on.

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