- 6 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
My partner and I have only been engaged for a few months and, when we first got engaged, we stated pretty clearly that weren’t planning on getting married for at least 18 months or so. Future Mother-In-Law only has two sons (I’m marrying her eldest, so I’ll be her first ever daughter in law), and I understand that she’s super excited to finally have a ‘daughter’ in the family, but lately she’s been driving me bonkers! Right from the start, they insisted on paying for half of the wedding – I know most people would kill to be in that position, but we seriously have enough money saved up, and it seems like they’re trying to use that as a was to get their way with wedding planning.
Anyway, we’ve finally started planning stuff for the wedding and, at first Future Mother-In-Law wasn’t too bad. She asked if I would like to wear a tiara at the wedding that her family has passed down for a few years and, naturally, I said yes. But it kinda started to get out of hand when we were picking a venue – my parents own a beautiful 6 acre garden and, originally, we were planning on holding the wedding there, but the Future In-Laws shouted it down, saying it was too far away for some of the family to travel, we figured that was fair enough, it’s nearly two hours from their hometown and they’ve got a few elderly family members. So Fiance and I began planning to have the wedding in a town about halfway between (a beautiful historic town with some amazing scenery, etc.), but every venue we’ve found, Future Mother-In-Law complains isn’t good enough and the ONLY venue she’s happy with is a restaurant in her hometown that’s run by her brother.
On top of that, we planned on having a wedding with roughly 120 people, and told our respective families that we’d invite about 40-50 people from families, and the rest would by our friends. Future Mother-In-Law threw a fit and said there was no way she was inviting less that 80 people and her guest list would probably be about 100 (keep in mind that my Fiance barely knows any family members outside his parents’ immediate family and that only comes to about 30 people), while just my dad’s immediate family (his brothers, sisters and their children) is over 60 people. I would have thought my parents would be the ones struggling to cut back the guest list, but Future Mother-In-Law is insisting on inviting people that my Fiance and I don’t know (FI actually thought some of these people were dead!).
Future Mother-In-Law says that they will pay for any extra family members, and that they’re “already paying for half anyway, so how can we complain??” Completely not realising that if they invite 100 people, then my family will want to as well, because that’s only fair, and that, plus Fiance and my friends, will bring our guest list to well over 200 people.
Not to mention that we’ll then have to find a completely different venue capable of holding that many people! Fiance (stupidly) told Future Mother-In-Law to find a venue that would hold that many guests and she’s taken him up on it, and is now insisting that we have the wedding in her brother’s restaurant.
If we try to talk her out of this, she just responds with “We’ll pay for the extra people, so it doesn’t matter to you if they come or not!” Completely oblivious to all the other changes that will make to our plans, and that we will still have to interact with these total strangers on our wedding day.