(Closed) fmil in black debate

posted 8 years ago in Dress
  • poll: can mothers wear black?
    yes : (62 votes)
    83 %
    no : (13 votes)
    17 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    4466 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    Honestly, I think it’s fine if she’s super-insistent on it.  I would prefer for MOB/MOG NOT to wear black (and they’re not planning on it) but I wouldn’t throw a fit about it either.

    I think the traditional thing is not to wear black to weddings at all, but I think that “rule” has kind of gone out the window.

    Post # 4
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    It’s not really a big deal anymore, unless one of the mothers is one of “those” moms. My friend’s mom wore a lovely black and sequined dress to her daughter’s wedding and my mom almost got her dress in black (but decided red was prettier on her for a summer wedding). Black doesn’t really carry the stigma it used to be. I’d be more sensitive to it if the groom’s mother, say, was really sad and couldn’t let go that her baby boy was growing up and getting married and couldn’t move on with her life. So i think it depends on the intentions of the person wearing it. Typically though, i think black is just formal and classy.

    Post # 5
    Member
    960 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I know my mom feels most comfortable in dark colors and will probably get a black dress. As for my Future Mother-In-Law, if she wants to wear black as well, then that’s just fine with me. My BMs will all be in black, too. Honestly, as long as mothers/other guests don’t wear white or off-white, I’m fine ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 6
    Member
    2475 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I think that rule is dated and it’s fine for mothers, as well as guests, to wear black to a wedding.

    Post # 8
    Member
    3285 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2009

    Unless it’s a huge cultural no-no, I would say it’s fine.

    Post # 9
    Member
    2365 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    Actually, I’ve noticed that lots of guests at formal weddings wear black. I also thought that wearing black is just wrong, especially one of the mothers of the b and g …

    Post # 10
    Member
    116 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    My Future Sister-In-Law threw a fit when her mother wore black to her wedding.  She is still complaining about it 10 years later.  I honestly don’t see what the big deal is.  I would rather she wore black than any shade of white.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1580 posts
    Bumble bee

    I don’t think the moms should wear black unless it is one of your colors or goes with your overall look. I’m putting my moms in complementary colors to the bridesmaids so our whole wedding party/family will look awesome. If she is most comfortable in black, how about a deep plumb or other deep jewel tone? It also depends on the season. Black would be more acceptable for a winter wedding than a summer wedding.

    Post # 12
    Member
    97 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    Totally depends on the venue, bridal party, and the person wearing it.  For example I’m having a beach/day wedding.  Black is out.  The evening weddings I think its totally ok.  If the bridal party is black (my Girlfriend did black with red sashes)….totally fine.  Like some other people on here said….personality is huge too.  If you have someone larger, feels more comfortable in darker colors fine.  If she is confused and sees the sadness in the event more than the great/positive/happy day it is….not ok.

    Post # 13
    Member
    636 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    I guess I am little more traditional when it comes to those rules. I always thought black was a no no for guests or MOB/Gs for anything except for a nighttime, formal/black-tie wedding.  However, I’ve been to quite a few weddings and at all of them someone was wearing a black cocktail dress.  I wouldn’t really have wanted my mother or my husband’s mother to wear black, but I think it’s really more of a personal/cultural preference now.

    Post # 14
    Member
    545 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    I also think the rule is dated now and not many people are following that.  However, I personally wouldn’t want anyone to wear black to my wedding, but that’s just a personal preference but I wouldn’t dictate what they wear, either – it’s merely a preference for my own reasons.

    If the mother is insisting on wearing black, I’d just let her to make her happy. ๐Ÿ™‚ 

    Post # 15
    Member
    596 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2009 - Ceremony: The Kraine Theatre, Reception: Midtown Loft & Terrace

    My Mom wore a black and white dress and I was totally cool with it. It looked awesome on her, fit with our colors, and I guess we weren’t all that traditional anyways ๐Ÿ˜‰ I say let her at it.

    Post # 16
    Member
    3332 posts
    Sugar bee

    My mom wore black and I was totally okay with it.  I thought it was kind of an outdated tradition that black signified something bad at a wedding.  I’ve worn a black dress as a guest and my Bridesmaid or Best Man wore black, so I thought it was totally fine for my mom.

    The topic ‘fmil in black debate’ is closed to new replies.

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