(Closed) FMIL issues

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 4
2296 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

i would arrange a sit down with you, your fi and your mil. then, calmly say exactly what you wrote. doesn’t have to be formal, maybe you could have dinner together this week.

let her know that your fi and you have discussed it and no more invitations will be going out – period. tell her that you hope that she’ll be happy with the 8 friends she will have there, and isn’t it nice that she’ll have them on the day?

have your fi do the lion’s share of the talking if possible, but you should be a united front so that she can’t call you or your Fiance the next day to test the boundaries. 

and just cause i’m crafty i’d make up a little anecdote about a friend, let’s call her mary, who is really stressing you out. Mary wasn’t invited with a +1 since she’s not dating anyone, but she’s pestering you for a +1 so she can bring a friend. isn’t that rude MIL? i mean, it’s not a saturday night party, it’s our wedding, we only want people who are close to us there/the budget is climbing/etc….at this point she’ll hopefully agree that yes, mary is in fact being rude 🙂 

also let her know that your mother is looking forward to hosting the shower with her! *HINT*


Post # 5
739 posts
Busy bee

As for invites to the wedding this is what we did. Figure out ALL the costs to have each person at the wedding. Each parent is allowed so many, after that, they cover the cost per person. So if Mother-In-Law wants to invite four more people tell her its $xxx per person if she wants them there.


As for the shower tell her to get in touch with your mom as she is taking care of everything and it’s out of your control.


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