Post # 1
Hopefully this doesn’t need to be moved to the college board.
Anyway, my Future Mother-In-Law and Future Father-In-Law can’t make it to my undergrad graduation ceremony next week. Soit hey ended up sending a $400 check in the mail. It was very generous of them and I truly appreciate it. They told me I could use the money for whatever I wanted. I decided instead of spending the money on things I don’t need, I would put $200 for the rest of the deopsitRon our photographer, and the rest would be used for the wedding somewhere down the line. Future Father-In-Law thought it was a great idea that I was putting it towards the wedding, but Future Mother-In-Law looked like she was going to cry over the fact that I hadn’t chose to use it on myself. I tried explaining to her that I truly didn’t want or need anything else. I have a nice laptop, my car is paid off, I live with my parents to save money and they got me a nice diploma frame and some alumni shirts. I thought maybe I could meet her halfway and still put $200 to the photographer and the rest would go tyour camping trip to PEI this summer. She was still pretty upset.
I guess I just needed to rant. They told me I could use it on anything 😛 should I still feel guilty about it? Or just move on?
Post # 3
That’s kind of you to put it toward the wedding. Maybe still buy yourself a *little* something (new shirt, pair of shoes, etc. for your upcoming new job), and hopefully that will put her a little more at ease, and you’ll be using it on a gift for the future!
Post # 4
PP is right — divert a little of it towards a splurge for yourself, and send Future Mother-In-Law a pic of yourself wearing it or using it.
Post # 5
I think the suggestions of the PPs are very thoughtful and gracious, and that’s probably what I would do. However, for principle’s sake (and if it makes you feel less guilty), I believe you are right – it was a gift to you and they told you you could do whatever you wanted with it. They can’t reasonably be disappointed or try to make conditions after the fact.
Post # 6
I agree with PPs. You technically did use it for yourself. The wedding is something for you 🙂 I agree that maybe buying a pair of shoes or jewelry would be a good idea, but you are not wrong in spending it on what you did.
Post # 7
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
You can use the money however you want, but I can see her disappointment that a gift for you is being spent on both you and FI- they gave you this gift to celebrate one monumental occasion in your life. They’ve probably planned other gifts for the wedding.
I used birthday money from my Dad to buy a new outfit for the rehearsal dinner, but that not a one time use.
Could you use an interview suit/business clothes/ interview bag/new purse, etc?- anything for this next phase in your life?