Post # 1
So after a lovely healthy dinner tonight with just FH and kiddo, I had the biggest Father-In-Law wedding intrusion bomb dropped on me:
My Future Mother-In-Law decided she would make a list of gifts she thinks we should put on our registry.
No, I am not kidding. I’m laughing out loud at this whole idea, but I’m not kidding. As I am typing this she has a list on her kitchen table for BB&B of things she thinks we might like, and wants to come with us tomorrow night when we go registering for gifts. She also told FH that if we don’t have the time this weekend to do the registries she will gladly do it for us.
I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around this – mostly because I honestly can’t stop laughing!! Is this even stinkin possible? Can a Father-In-Law fill out a gift registry for you? Do FIL’s usually fill out registries for the couple? I know she just wants to help, and she knows we are super busy and not into the whole gift thing – but seriously? Is this common?
Post # 3
ha wow thats very…sweet? but she sounds a little, well, pushy! im glad you can laugh at it and not take it so personal and end up having issues, so good for you for taking it in stride! wow, can you politely tell her that although you appreciate her input and wanting to help, youve got it convered? ha i have never heard of this but it doesnt suprise me. i definitely wouldnt let my fmil or my own mom fill out my registry for me!! i would listen to their suggestions but in the end, you have to pick things that you know you and your hubby will want/need.
Post # 4
Someone needs a reality check fast. Your registry is none of her fricking business. What else does she plan to dictate after you’re married? Register for whatever you want and let the store know to not change it unless you do so in person to prevent her from altering it to fit her view of appropriate. Honestly though, that would be a red flag to me that your relationship is headed for trouble if the Future Mother-In-Law is that dictatorial. What is your fiance’s stance on this?
For the record, no one but the bride and groom themselves sets up their registry. No one else knows what they want or need.
Post # 5
Holy crap. Maybe she’s just really excited about your wedding, but that seems pretty out of line. Is she going to be upset if you don’t register for her suggestions?
Post # 6
Sounds way too pushy in my opinion. It’s up to you and your FH to register, not her! It’s your wedding. I would take her list and say thank you and not make a big fuss about it, but register only items that YOU want, not what she thinks!
Post # 7
Wow, she has some Kahones.. lol.. At least you have a good attitude about it. Good luck difusing this one though! Hopefully, she’ll take the news that it’s not her job easily.. haha
Post # 8
@Selene – FH says he thinks we are busy and she just wants to help – he also just said he thinks it’s nice she wants to help us wherever she can. He’s cool though, he says he wants us to build the registry, just the two of us, together tomorrow.
@vegan – I don’t think she’ll be mad. I set some good boundaries with her when we bought our house.
I just wondered if this was norm or out of line. . . .
Post # 9
LMAO I would be laughing as well :o)!!!!!!!!!!
Post # 10
I can understand how you might feel intruded on. Tell her that you and fh know what you want already in a way that dosn’t offend her she is probably just trying to help.